All Up In My Head [Completed]

13 Sundown

Sundown

It’s been almost 2 weeks since Lila heard of Jace. Wala pa rin siyang balita kung nasaan ito. Some of his classmates told her that he attended his major subjects today. Kaya naman minabuti ulit niya puntahan ito sa kanila. Kailangan niyang makausap ang lalaki. The important thing is to make sure that he is fine. But when she arrived, she regretted having the heart to care for him.

“Jace?” she whispered, aghast of the two figures laying on the couch. Natuptop niya ang bibig. “Bakit...”

Gulat ang dalawa nang makita siya. The lights were dimmed. There was a movie playing on the TV screen. And the two people were her boyfriend and Tanya, the very person who was so concerned of him. He was half-naked while she’s on her tank top, the straps aren’t even on. Now it all makes sense, she thought.

Wala na siyang ibang masabi. She turned back, hoping that it was all a lie.

“Lila, teka lang!” Dinig niya ang sigaw nito.

“Umalis ka muna, Tanya,” anito sa babae.

She looked at Tanya’s face. “Ikaw pa talaga ang...”

Yumuko ito at nahihiyang kinuha ang mga damit.

“I-I’m sorry, Lila,” she even added.

Lila looked away, feeling stupid. Nanakit ang kanyang lalamunan. The tears on her eyes were about to fall but she remained calm. So calm that her insides are almost burning.

“Wala lang ‘yon. Nag-uusap lang kami,” he started.

Lila laughed throwing her head back. “Hindi ako bulag, Jace. I always knew you were going to do that. Alam mo ‘yong mas nakakagago?” Her tears started falling freely. “Kasi ni hindi man lang ako nakaramdaman ng sorpresa when I saw the two of you.” Nilamukos niya ang buhok.

Hindi niya matignan ang lalaki. She wants to hurt him. She wants to throw a punch on his face. But she’s too weak to do any of that.

“Itigil na natin ‘to,” bulong niya saka tinalikuran ang lalaki.

But he held her arms. “I’m sorry, Lila! Gago ako, alam ko ‘yon. Kasalanan ko ang lahat. Wala akong kwentang boyfriend sa’yo. Wala rin yata akong kwentang tao. I hurt you. Nagpadala ako sa mga sinasabi nito.” Tinuro nito ang ulo.

He slowly got down on his knees. “Dapat siguro mawala na lang ako.” Hawak nito ang kanyang dalawang kamay, nagmamakaawa.

He sniffled. “Nag-away kami ni dad. Sinusumbatan niya pa rin ako dahil hindi ako naging army gaya niya. Mataas na sana raw ang ranggo ko. Eh hindi ko naman ‘yon gusto.” He smiled sadly.

Napapikit si Lila sa galit. She pulled her hands away as she sarcastically laughed in between her sobs. Ni hindi niya na alam kung umiiyak o tumatawa ba siya.

“Kakaiba ka talaga. You always manage to make everything about yourself.”

She bit her lip, breathing inwardly. Nahihirapan na siyang huminga. Ang bigat ng kanyang pakiramdam.

“Huwag ka nang magpakita sa’kin. Nasusuka ako sa pagmumukha mo. Hinanap kita kasi akala ko kailangan mo ng kasama pero ito ka, kasama ‘yong babaeng...” She stopped. “Bakit ba ako nagpapaloko sa inyo?” Nasapo niya ang mukha.