All Up In My Head [Completed]

15 Look Back

Look Back

“A-aray... Ang ulo ko...” Her head throbbed as she opened her eyes. Nasilaw siya sa sinag ng araw na galing sa bintana. She closed her eyes again.

“Gising ka na?” It’s Shane’s voice.

“Shane?” Bumangon siya mula sa pagkakahiga saka kinusotkusot ang mga mata.

Pumalatak ang kaibigan. “Buti ka pa, sa higaan ka talaga nakapwesto.”

“Ano bang nangyayari- ah!” She held her temple. Lila can still taste the acid from her mouth. There were glimpses that flash through her mind. Nalasing siya kagabi at iyon ang sigurado. Someone helped her out.

“Nakatulog ako sa banyo. Tsaka naghubad ka rin pala sa harap ni Ewan kagabi so ayon.” Shane shrugged.

“Anong sinasabi mo?” nalilito niyang tanong.

Siya? Naghubad? Sa harap ni Ewan?

“Kasalanan mo ‘yan. Alalahanin mo.” Napailing si Shane sa kanya.

Pagkatingin niya sa oras ay tsaka lang siya nagising. Kailangan na nilang umuwi. Hinahanap na siya sa kanila. Mamaya niya na lang aalahanin ang lahat.

Unti-unti ngang bumalik sa kanyang alaala ang nangyayari. Ang tanga, sa isip niya. She swore to herself not to drink again. Bakit ba gustong-gusto ng iba na magpakalasing? It didn’t even feel nice after or even during. Hiyang-hiya siya sa sarili at sa lalaki.

Anong mukha na ang ihaharap niya? After that day, she didn’t talk to him again. She said to herself that she’s only going to let the memories pass on her mind but it didn’t. Lucky for her, it wasn’t that hard to avoid him. He’s busy with his thing in the swimming team and his thesis. All of the information were given by Shane.

However, these past few days, Ewan has been sending random food and greetings courtesy by her good friend, Shane.

“Kain ka raw.” Nilapag nito ang isang tub ng carbonara sa mesa.

“Kanino ‘to galing?” tanong niya.

“Ewan mo, Lila?” Shane joked.

Nakikain na lamang siya dahil mukha itong masarap.

Isang araw, na-late siyang pumasok sa lib. She spotted Ewan entering the premises, few feet away from her. Agad siyang umatras sa gilid ng poste. Nakita rin niya si Shane na papasok. Her friend eyed her suspiciously. Good thing, Shane was quick on her wits and thought an excuse for her.

“Wala si Lila. May LBM,” Shane exclaimed in an exaggerated manner.

They talked for awhile before Ewan left.

“Ba’t mo kasi iniiwasan?” she asked.

Napabuntong-hininga siya. “Hindi ko rin alam,” sagot niya pa.

What is she doing? Lila can’t possibly still embarrassed about that night. There were people who did worse than her. This time she said to herself not to avoid him again. He’s Ewan, he’s probably not thinking about it.

“Why are you avoiding me?” he asked when he finally got the chance to see her. Looks like he’s been waiting outside near the line of jeeps. Wala na yata siyang kawala.

“I’m not.”

Binilisan niya ang paglalakad. But what can she do when he walks with his big strides?

“Sabi mo okay tayo?” May pagtatampo sa boses nito.

“Okay naman talaga,” she exclaimed still walking.