S U R R E N D E R

chapter thirty seven

October 27th, 2020.

Lisa sighed and looked at her refection on the rear view mirror as she sat in her parked car. She doesn't remember what time she left her house and how long she had been just sitting in her car that was pulled over at the parking lot of Jennie's apartment complex. She tried her best to regain her power and find the strength to get out and walk all the way up to Jennie's apartment but there was that mental block that kept her back every time that thought crossed her mind. Lisa had talked with her own self so many times the past couple of days and she couldn't find one good excuse to blame her disappearance from Jennie's life for the past week. Looking up from where she was sitting with her hands on the steering wheel Lisa let out another sigh, her chest tightening as she looked directly at Jennie's apartment that seemed abandoned.

                              ~~~~

"Can you tell me why you're so tense? What's wrong with you?" Jisoo asked and took a seat right next to Lisa who seemed to be a lot more stressed than she usually was. Both of them knew this was not good, not only because Lisa had a long history of anxiety attacks due to stress but because this was not the best time to have such incidents happening. Lisa didn't say anything at first, she just looked out of the window in her office hoping that this uneasy feeling would suddenly go away and leave her alone. "Is this about Jennie? Did something happen?" Jisoo asked suddenly and as if by queue Lisa's phone started ringing, Jennie's name popping up immediately, both of them looking right at it but neither of them approached to get it. "No, nothing happened" Lisa simply said and turned around again once the phone stopped ringing, the annoying noise getting lost pretty soon.

"Is that why you're not picking up her calls? Because nothing happened?" Jisoo asked and tried her best to grill her best friend in case she could get some sort of answers as to why Lisa had been in such a bad mood the last couple of days. It's not every day that she saw Lisa feeling under the weather and when she did Jisoo was usually the one that could understand what was bothering her instantly. "I don't know what I'm supposed to tell her. I don't know how I'm supposed to act anymore and it's beyond frustrating" Lisa finally let go of her ego and decided to speak up about how she was feeling, if anyone could sit and listen to her was Jisoo. And Lisa was grateful for that. "You make things harder than what they are Lils" Jisoo laughed and got up as well now joining Lisa next to the huge window pane that provided her with a view of Seoul in its entirety.

"What are you saying?" Lisa snapped back immediately wanting to hear more of what her friend had to say. And she would, she would hear a lot more but that didn't necessarily mean that she would like it as well. "I'm saying that you've put yourself in a situation that's only getting messier by the minute and you need to choose between two things at this point." Jisoo started off and took a deep breath as well, things were about to get hard and she was going to go deep into this situation, she had to be calm to do so. "You're getting married to Evelyn and you want to have Jennie as well. Is that right?" Jisoo asked even though she knew the answer already, Lisa nodding and waiting to hear where this would go. "So you need to choose between Evelyn or Jennie. You're going to lose one of them regardless, you can't have both, your heart doesn't fit both people." Jisoo put it plain and simple so she wouldn't cause Lisa to misunderstand anything, her best friend now looking right into her eyes.

"Don't use your head though." Jisoo pointed out and she noticed how Lisa swallowed hard and looked down for a split second. "Use this for once." Her friend said and poked at Lisa's chest, her heart to be more exact, to emphasize what she meant. "No matter what it is and what it chooses, you'll have to go for it because trust me there's nothing like going after what your own heart chooses. Even if you lose in the end, you'll understand that it was worth it, no matter what it cost you."