One Day ~ larry mpreg au ~ book 2

5. GRIEF

When Louis woke up that Sunday, the grief immediately consumed him, and he felt so lost that he didn't know what to do.

He placed his hand on his flat stomach, and wished his tiny baby was still inside of him, and as he closed his eyes, he imagined what their lives would have been if he hadn't miscarried.

He knew his due date would have been on June 3rd, which meant he would have given birth before his and Harry's 11th wedding anniversary, and Tori would have become a sister before her 14th birthday.

He suddenly imagined Harry holding their little baby, a big smile on his face as he looked down at that baby... a little boy... or maybe a girl.

Harry had met Tori when she was 2, so he had never been the dad to a newborn baby, and so he didn't know what that was like, and Louis' heart ached knowing that Harry wouldn't get to experience that with the baby they lost.

Louis opened his eyes, wiped the tears that had fallen down his cheeks, and looked at his husband, who was still asleep next to him.

He had been so strong for him since Friday night, and Louis loved him for that, but he felt so guilty for losing their baby, and although rationally he knew it hadn't been his fault and that Harry didn't blame him, he still felt that guilt consuming him.

"Harry" Louis said softly, wanting his husband to woke up so he could hold him.

Harry made a cute little sound, then stirred, and finally opened his eyes lazily. But the soft look in his eyes quickly turned into worry when he looked at Louis.

"Come here" Harry immediately said turning to his side.

Louis got closer to him, and Harry wrapped him in his arms, and kissed his head, knowing that that was what Louis needed

That was what happened after being married for 10 years, and being together for 11.

"I'm sorry" Louis said as he sobbed in his arms.

"Don't apologize for anything" Harry told him "I'm here".

It took a while for Louis to calm down, but he still stayed in Harry's arms, as that was where he felt safe and protected.

"What can I do to make this better for you?" Harry wondered.

"Just stay here with me" Louis told him.

"We can stay in bed all day together if you want" Harry assured him.

"What about Tori?" Louis questioned.

"She could cuddle with us, or stay in her room if she wants, or we could let her go to London" Harry considered "I bet she prefers that last one".

"I don't know..." Louis sighed.

"I think the time has come for us to start to let go a little" Harry considered "She's a teenager now".

"I know, and I trust her to be smart and careful, but it's other people that I don't trust" Louis bit his lip.

"My vote is for us to let her go, it's just a 35 minute ride, and we can ask Gemma to wait for her at the station, and then take her back there when they're done, and make sure she gets on the train" Harry explained.