--------
Logan, drunk, at 2am: Snakes have this thing called a hemipenis, it means they have two dicks.
Virgil, equally drunk: Janus has two dicks... one in his pants, and one in his personality.
Janus, to himself: I just came down for a snack...
--------
Patton: If I run and jump at Logan, he will almost definitely catch me.
Patton: (Runs at Logan)
Logan: Patton no, I'm holding coffee!
-(Drops coffee to catch Patton)
--------
Virgil: I told you, I'm fine. Why the hell do you keep asking?
Roman: You just had 10 cups of coffee in two minutes...
Virgil: I just can't sleep-
Roman: Babe, we've talked about this.
--------
Logan: Hey Roman?
Roman: Yes my bespeckled friend?
Logan, hesitantly: Well you're the most romantic side so I thought it would be wise to seek your help since I want to confess to-
Roman, immediatly dropping everything he was doing: Sounds gay, I'm in.
--------
Kidnapper, calling Janus: We have Remus.
Janus: No, he has you.
Kidnapper: Wait, wha- (BANG)
(Kidnapper falls over and Remus grabs the phone)
Remus: Hi, Jan Jan!
Janus: Hello sweetheart.
--------
Logan, making Patton face him: And if you're gonna call me cute, then you bett- mm, you better-
Patton, looks into his eyes, smirking: Yes?
Logan, blushing: (Hides his face in Patton's shoulder)
Patton: Aww
Logan, pushes Patton back a bit: Stoooop.
Patton: (Bursts out laughing)
--------
Remy: I am an emotional gangster.
Emile: You cried for an hour yesterday after you saw ducklings following their mother.
Remy: I was tired...
Emile: That's not all of it-
Remy, tearing up: They were just lined up so perfectly and they KNEW!
--------
YOU ARE READING
Sanders Sides Oneshots *Read Description*
FanfictionI can take requests for a ship or prompt. This is fluff btw, some stories will also have warnings about sensitive topics. I do NOT do romantic RemRom!!
