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After our first date that night, we keep spending every possible minutes together since the due of my surgery keep getting nearer and I'll need to stay at hospitals for two weeks beforehand.
Sometimes we go to our favourite spot; the lake but most of times, you'll come to hang out at my place.
Until all of a sudden...you didn't come to see me for five days.
You had text Yuta to inform me that you have some important things to do and you can't come like usual but whenever I call you, you never pick it up.
Sometimes you even rejected it directly. You just reply with several short messages afterwards saying that you will be back later and I don't have to be worry.
But... That's the problem.
You made me restless. With your absence, I feel empty and incredibly alone... Am I being too attached to you already?
I lost my sleep because of my thoughts about you. I even sneak out to kitchen at night and steal some of Yuta's alcohol. I knew where he stored his alcohols. I'm never a fan of this drink; I even hate the numbness that it give.
But right now, I'm drinking it just to forget about you for even a moment.
I want to keep calling you until you will finally pick up my calls but I don't want to suffocate you. I choose to trust you.
So, I hold myself tight. Each night I put my head on the pillow, I convince myself that it's okay. Everything is okay.
