Dear Theodosia: blow us all away (philidosia)

9: I love you

After checking to make sure that the children are okay, Philip heads out of the house. He walks down the street to his old house. Philip slips inside the back door. Once inside he takes in the house. It's a disaster.

Papers are everywhere. Every possible surface that could hold papers, has papers on it. Each page is covered front to back with writing. As Philip moves further into the house, his boots crunch over broken glass.

"Pa," Philip calls out, "Are you home?"

Philip wanders through the house, searching for his father. As soon as he steps into the kitchen, the smell hits him. Vomit and alcohol. Covering his nose, Philip moves further into the kitchen. He finds his father, passed out on the floor in a puddle of vomit and spilled alcohol.

Gagging, Philip rolls his father over. He then fills a bucket with ice cold water and throws it onto his father's face to wake up.

His father gasps at the shock and sits up. Deliriously he looks around the room until his eyes fall on Philip.

"My son," he rasps, "You're here. Have you decided to forgive me?"

Philip scoffs, "No! I will not forgive you, ever. I just came to tell you something."

Alexander swallows hard, "what is it?"

"I just wanted to tell you that mother was badly burned and almost died. She's okay now though."

Alexander gasps, "What happened to her? Can I see her?"

"What happened was that you cheated on her, then decided to publish a 95 page pamphlet, detailing the affair to the public, then mother decided it was her fault you cheated on her and therefore she deserved to die, so she tried to take her own life. The only reason she is alive now is because Theodosia Burr saved her. And as for your second question, no you may not see her. I just came here to tell you out of courtesy, since you're technically still her husband."

Alexander lays down on the floor, crying pathetically. "My son, please tell her I am very very sorry. I meant for none of this to happen, I love your mother very much."

"If you love her so much, then why did you do all this?"

Alexander gasps, as if he is physically in pain, "I don't know. Angelica was right I'll never be satisfied, I can never be satisfied. I don't deserve your mother, she's too good for me."

"You're right about that, you don't deserve her. I hope you're finally satisfied." Philip stands up and leaves. He turns around in the doorway, "Don't forget to take care of yourself, Pa. Mama's had enough heartbreak already." Then Philip leaves and goes back to Angelica's.

At Angelica's he prepares breakfast for his mother, then heads upstairs. As he enters the room he finds Peggy, Theodosia and his mother all asleep on his mother's bed. Philip walks over to them and places his mother's food on the bedside table. He pulls a blanket over all of them and kisses each of their foreheads, before leaving and gently shutting the door behind him.

Later that day, Philip is sitting in his bedroom, writing in one of his poem books, when Theodosia comes in. She stands behind him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing his cheek.

"What're you writing about?" she asks.

Philip blushes and covers the poem with his hand, "nothing."

"Why are you covering it up?" Theodosia laughs, "is it about me or something?"

"Possibly," Philip mutters, his face burning.

"Let me read it!" Theodosia says, trying to pull his hand off the poem.

Giggling they wrestle for the poem for a minute before Philip finally gets a hold of it. He crows, holding the poem high above his head.