Dear Theodosia: blow us all away (philidosia)

42: All my fault

"You need to exercise your legs," Georges tells Philip earnestly.

"No, they hurt. Can't you just push me in my chair?" Philip whines.

"No, you've only been walking a few days, you need to keep your legs loose. Come on, if you get too tired, I'll carry you."

"Fine," Philip says, "but we're not walking all the way to the woods."

"Deal." Georges grabs Philip's hand and pulls him out of his chair.

The two boys venture out into the town square, Philip relying heavily on Georges.

"You're doing great today!" Georges says encouragingly to a sour Philip.

Philip glares at him and sticks his tongue out.

"You are a literal child Pip," Georges tells him through laughter.

"Shut up."

"You just keep on proving my point."

Philip shoves Georges' shoulder, but the glare melts off his face and he smiles.

Philip and Georges walk through the market together, exploring stalls and picking up some new fabrics for Eliza.

"Come on, we're going to the bakery," Georges says, dragging Philip along behind him.

"Good, I wanna say hi to your dad, I haven't seen him in forever."

The bell on the door jingles as Philip and Georges enter the town bakery. Georges immediately runs over to the bread baskets, dragging Philip behind him.

"Oh my god, Pip, look how incredible these baguettes look today! They're soooo beautiful!"

"You're such a dork!" Philip says laughing.

As Georges punches Philip on the arm, Lafayette comes out from the kitchen, carrying a large tray of baguettes.

Lafayette throws the trays of baguettes into Georges' arms then sweeps Philip into a tight hug.

"It's been too long Philip!"

"I know, I haven't seen you in forever! It's good to see you again!"

"You too!"

After he puts Philip down he loads the boy's baskets up with baked goods.

"We'd better get going home now dad," Georges tells Lafayette.

"Philip Hamilton, you'd better come visit me again," Lafayette threatens as Georges pulls Philip out the store.

"I will!" Philip calls over his shoulder.

Out on the street the boys start shoving each other again and laughing loudly. As they're messing around Philip accidentally bumps into a young woman, knocking her basket full of ribbons on the ground. 

"I'm so sorry ma'am," he says leaning down to pick up the ribbons.

"Philip?" a familiar voice asks.

Philip lifts his head up, only to jerk it back when he comes face to face with Theodosia. His mouth opens and closes, but no words come out. 

"Philip, I'm so sorry," Theodosia whispers. She grabs her basket and runs into the crowd.

"Theodosia!" Philip calls out, still holding on to one of her ribbons, but she doesn't turn around.

Philip shakily gets back on his feet and runs back into the square, weaving his way between people.

"Philip!" Georges calls, but Philip ignores him.

"Theodosia!" Philip shouts.

He can't catch her, not with his injury, but Philip is hoping she'll decide to stop.

"Theodosia!" he calls out again, panting. His hip aches, but he's almost caught up with Theodosia, so he doesn't stop.

Philip lunges forward and grabs onto Theodosia's shoulder.

"Theodosia, I need to talk to you!"

"Leave me alone Philip!" she says, trying to squirm away from him.

"Please, can we just talk?"

Suddenly Philip feels someone yank him away from Theodosia.

"Don't touch my daughter, Hamilton," A voice hisses in Philip's ear, causing him to shiver.

Philip twists so he can see Burr's face. "I just need to talk to her, this doesn't concern you Burr."

"Hell yeah it does," Burr says, then pulls out a knife and stabs it into Philip's chest.

The square goes silent for ten seconds before erupting into chaos. Theodosia lets out an earsplitting scream and Burr drops Philip on the ground before taking off running towards the woods. People start screaming and gathering up their children.

"Philip!" Theodosia screams, running over to him.

She pulls his head into her lap and strokes his hair, sobbing softly.

"Philip I'm so sorry," she says.

Philip doesn't respond. Theodosia grabs his wrist and feels for a pulse but there is none.

"You can't die," she sobs, "I love you..."

Theodosia, shakes Philip, sobbing.

"I love you, I love you, please wake up, I love you.

Theodosia leans down and kisses Philip's bloody lips. They're cold.

She collapses onto the ground sobbing, still holding onto Philip. Hands try to pry her away from Philip, but she screams at them and holds him tighter.

"It's all my fault," she sobs.

Suddenly Theodosia remembers something. This song that Philip's mother would always sing to him when he was sad as a child.

"Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf," she sings softly. Theodosia sobs quietly. "Sept, huit, neuf... sept, huit..."

Theodosia hears a loud piercing scream and she closes her eyes.

"I love you," she whispers.

Still with her eyes closed, Theodosia reaches forward until she feels the cool metal of the knife on her hand. She yanks the knife out of Philip's chest, feeling warm blood drip down her hand.

Theodosia lifts the knife up then stabs it into her chest. She gasps at the piercing pain.

Her eyes flutter open. She sees blurry faces over her.

Theodosia lets out a deep sigh and closes her eyes.

Her hand is linked with Philip's.