heaven ☆ mick mars

34.

"so...nikki's sister, huh?" richie asked me as he continued to scribble on the sheet of new lyrics.

"yep, nikki's sister." i felt myself become more nauseous by the second, the reality of the circumstances catching up with me as i realised i couldn't run from them forever.

i did a double take on my answer. richie's right. i don't want to be just referred to as nikki's sister anymore, as happy as i am that he's my brother. i'm lillian.

"what's it like touring with the crüe? we're huge fans."

"it's..pretty crazy, haha." i chuckled half-heartedly. in the distance i could see doc talking to nikki. they must be leaving for soundcheck soon. my brother's attention fell on me, he gestured for me to go over. "listen i think we're heading to soundcheck soon, big concert tonight."

"oh yeah, sweet, we tried to get tickets but they all sold out." richie told me, his eyes squinting from the sun as he looked at me. "have a good one, i hope to see you again. oh and i hope you..find a way to deal with the guy being an asshole, situation."

i smiled, unsure of how to reply. "thank you." was all i could muster right now.

as i began to walk away, i heard richie speak again. "hey thanks for the lyrics, by the way. i have a good feeling about this one."

i turned back but kept walking. "hope to hear it on the radio someday." i smiled. as i turned back i nearly bumped into a guy heading towards richie.

"i'm so sorry!" we said simultaneously.

"watch it jon!" richie shouted.

i kept walking until i met nikki, who put his arm around me. "ready to pack?" he asked, but to me, 'ready to pack' translated to 'ready to face mick?'. the answer was no. but it was unavoidable.

i nodded slowly, inhaling and exhaling deeply to calm myself down.

"do you want me to come with you?" he spoke quietly as we reached the hotel reception.

"no, it's okay. i need to do this alone." i smiled softly at him.

"you look tired."

"i am.."

i began to walk alone up to the room, half praying mick was still at the pool, half hoping he wasn't. something had to give, we needed to talk, or at least try to.

as i opened the door of our room, i immediately saw him stood over a suitcase looking flustered. as soon as his eyes met mine, a heartbroken expression fell on his face.

"hey.." i mustered the courage to say.

"lillian.."