heaven ☆ mick mars

28.

me and mick reached our room and i instantly ran over to the bed, burying my face in the sheets, praying that i could just stay there forever. because the thought that my worst nightmares are in the same building as me as i try to sleep is exactly what will keep me awake.

feeling my eyes begin to water, i kept my face in the pillow. that was, until mick came over and sat on the bed beside me. i felt his hand on my back, rubbing it soothingly, acting as relief from my anxiety.

we remained in silence for a few moments before i sat up, tears now flowing down my cheeks as my solemn eyes met mick's.

with a concerned expression he pulled me into his arms. i take back what i said about remaining buried in the cushion, i want to stay right here forever instead.

"you know i won't let anything happen to you." his voice spoke softly and quietly, barely breaking the silence.

"but what they said...about my records-"

"we're mötley fucking crüe, lill. we want something, we got it. they can't take anything or anyone away from us."

i now took the time to observe the room around me. cosy, warm, a golden glow radiating from the window. the room had a lock, the window had a lock, and more importantly, i had mick mars by my side. along with the rest of the band, who had seemingly been sober for 24 hours...for me.

"i'll be okay." i said out loud, as if saying it in my head wasn't enough, hearing mick hum in response.

deja vu struck me as i remembered all the times i've been afraid, every damn time, mick was always there. and suddenly...i wasn't afraid anymore.

the truth is, part of me was worried that this was all so soon, TOO soon.

but it's just right.

for the first time in my life, i feel stable. i feel safe, i feel happy.

even with my parents attempting to cause chaos, it didn't stop me from feeling blissful and optimistic.

jokes on them. i have protection now. i have defence. i'm basically invincible, and they hate it. so they can fire their missiles, they can attempt to claim me as their possession. but i know, they won't win. they're afraid. afraid of the fact that i'm not that same terrified little girl i was, cowering in the corner. because the people who loved me now, helped me channel my strength. they make me feel powerful.

i was interrupted from my thoughts by a soft knocking at the door. "stay there." mick said, shortly giving me a kiss before getting up and looking through the peephole. "it's the boys. is it okay for me to let them in?" i nodded and smiled, wiping the tears from my face.

tommy dived onto the bed next to me, nikki sat the other side, vince stood flipping through a magazine, attempting the avoid eye contact, and mick sat in the arm chair in the corner after locking the door.

after a few moments of silence, i decided to speak up. "is this you guys trying to act natural?"

"dammit vince, i told you the magazine was too much!" nikki snapped before folding his arms, tommy placing his arms behind his head.

mick sat up. "well, we can't just avoid the subject." he said.

"you're right old man. can't believe your folks just showed up like that! that's fucked up man." tommy spoke before twiddling his drumstick in his hand.

nikki scoffed. "our stepdads a prick."

"ya think?" i said, raising my eyebrows at him.

"look...i know you all think i'm a dumbass but...we're mötley fucking crüe guys! we can take them, any day. we'll just like, sue the shit outta them!" tommy stood up on the bed and attempted to give us a motivation speech.

"they don't have any money..." i replied.

"yeah? so? if we sue them, we'll get like, millions of dollars!"

we all facepalmed at his stupidity.

"we won't let him hurt you, lillian."

"hey, who said i need you guys to protect myself? women power!"

"YOU GO GIRL!" tommy now shouted. we all chuckled.

it was now nikki's turn to stand up. "hey, no clubbing tonight guys. i think tonight is a movie night."

i smiled to myself as all the guys agreed, pulling my knees up to my chest. i looked over at me who gave me an encouraging smile.

did i mention that i love him?