heaven ☆ mick mars

24.

i smiled at the warmth of mick's hand as we entered the airport, his suitcase wheeling behind us.

something about airports always fascinated me. i never went often, but i do remember when i was 14, mom dragged me to the airport just outside la to pick up her new man.

frustration ran through my veins at the time, as my pathetic excuse of a mother as usual paid me no attention, simply lifted her head up like a meerkat over the crowds of people, attempting to find "steve".

i had attempted to calm myself down by looking at the people around me. there was something about the people rushing left and right, some looking lost, some looking like they hadn't slept for 24 hours and some that looked completely lost, that calmed me down. i found the concept of every single person having their own individual story intriguing. i then scoffed to myself, thinking about how much people would care about my story. near enough not at all.

my mind was brought back to present day due to mick's sudden movement.

it didn't occur to us that mötley fans would be there, but they were. i don't know how they found out mick would be there, but news of the band spreads like a wildfire. he gasped and mick's hand released quickly from mine as he noticed the fans lined up behind a barrier, a few of them pointing at us. i looked over at mick, a little shocked as a slight pain hit my chest. so this was it? we had to just pretend we weren't a couple?

anxiety began to rush through my blood as i felt my throat tighten and my body tense up.

i didn't like this side of mick.

i get it, rockstar image. to an extent.

but now, looking at mick's face, his stone cold expression, it was like looking at a stranger.

we went from being in each other's embrace back at the villa to acting as if we weren't even together at the airport, just people walking not intentionally side by side.

he even went as far as to walk at a faster speed so that he was a few feet in front of me, leaving me with my mouth gaping slightly, my eyebrows frowned with sadness.

looking at the fans, he smiled and nodded towards them as they screamed his name.

my blood began to boil as he even glared back at me, looking as if i was following him. i felt my face twist in shock and disgust.

in this moment i realised, he wasn't my mick. he was theirs. he always would be.

part of me began panicking and overthinking. what if it's always like this? what if he always chooses his rockstar life and image over me?

then again, i can't ask him to choose between the two.

after he had walked out of sight of them, it only remained with the fans looking at me. surely they must've seen me and mick holding hands, because they were looking at me with the weirdest most judgemental expressions, cameras flashing at me. i quickly glanced to them trying not to give much attention.

"is that his daughter?"

i felt my heart in my throat as mick stood waiting for me around the corner. i glared at him with hurt in my eyes.

"what's wrong?" he asked as i kept walking, not bothering to stop for him. he jogged a little to keep up with my fast paced walk. "lillian, why are you mad?"

i stopped and turned to face him, my blood boiling with embarrassment, hurt and anger.

"what's wrong? why am i mad? are you serious mick? am i really expected to just be okay with you treating me as if i'm invisible because you're embarrassed of me?"

he looked shocked and speechless as i raised my voice at him, gaining attention from people passing by.

"e-embarrassed? lillian, you...you're being crazy-"

"but we can't hold hands in public. we can't even walk next to each other. because you couldn't risk damaging your rock star image. you couldn't stand to hear the questions they'd ask."

"don't you see how it looks? i've never been that guy lillian! i've never been the guy that is with a girl, i have a reputation for being respectful and single. what is the world gonna think if i'm walking around with someone who barely looks 19!"

"why the fuck does it matter what other people think?!"

"well of course you wouldn't understand, you've never been in the limelight before, if it wasn't for me saving your ass at that show you'd still be crying in your bedroom!" he shouted before realising the strength and pain of his words, a shocked and guilty expression fell upon his face.

i squinted my eyes at him and shook my head, absolutely broken. this whole thing...it may only be small, but it brought me to the ground a little. it was all too good to be true. we could be together behind closed doors, but when it comes to the outside world, we couldn't even stand within a 5 metre radius of each other. i was so hurt and taken aback by his words.

"lillian, i'm so sorry, i didn't mean it-"

"you asshole!" i shouted before running to the toilets, tears now streaming down my face. i saw blurry figures and faces look towards me as i let out a sob, my face now burning red with embarrassment. i ran into the toilets and slammed the cubicle door shut, letting my emotions out.

and at this point, everything spilled. with everything happening with my brother, my sudden realisation that if me and mick couldn't work in public then we just wouldn't...it was all too much.

i didn't care, if he got on that plane without me.

i should've never left the sunset strip.

[trouble in paradise...

btw was lillian a little...dramatic, in this chapter? idk i was writing it then thought..maybe she should chill a bit. let me know what you thought! also thank you for all the love and support the story has been getting i really appreciate it and it's motivating me to write more!❤️]