So Wrong Yet Feels So Right

Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It's been two weeks since I got here. I received another chat from Jeremiah, asking me where am I but I didn't reply to him.

What happened between us, no matter how good it feels was wrong... definitely wrong.

It was just a consensual act of the both of us. No other feeling but lust. At isa pa, sigurado namang balewala lang iyon sa kaniya.

I knew that I got him surprise for being inexperienced but I don't think it was really a big deal.

Honestly, I don't want to get any communication from him anymore. He may understand me that night and gave me a shoulder to cry on but it should end that way. We cannot even be friends. Of course we cannot! Being friends with him meaning it would also be inevitable to get associated with his sister. That would be absurd!

Umalis na sina auntie Roma noong isang linggo at kami na lang ni Rafa ang naiwan sa bahay.

Apparently, he is working in a high-end fashion brand here that is why he can't join his parents in the Philippines that easy. Though, he is already working on it. He's targeting to be transferred in their branch in Manila.

"Rafa, what's up for lunch?" I asked him.

Sa aming dalawa ay siya itong marunong magluto kaya sa kaniya ako umaasa para makakain ng matino. Iyon nga lang ay may katamaran din ito.

Naisip ko tuloy na iyon siguro dapat ang pagkaabalahan ko sa mga susunod na araw. I should learn early how to cook since I'd be cooking for myself once Rafael go back to the Philippines.

"I'll attend a fashion week. I didn't cooked," Rafa answered with his eyes on his laptop.

Unlike me, he is pretty hardworking.

"Alright, magpapadeliver na lang ako. What do you want?"

"I already did. Nasa table," Rafa with his noticeable foreign accent.

Iniwanan ko na siya para at hindi na inabala pa sa ginagawa. Agad akong nagtungo sa kusina para makakain na ng pinadeliver ni Rafa.

As usual, it's another French cuisine I can't even spell. Good thing there is a mushroom soup that I love.

"I'm gonna eat now," I shouted at Rafa.

I'm almost done eating the main course when I tried the mushroom soup and immediately felt dizzy.

Gosh, what is that? Bumaliktad ang sikmura ko at agad na tinakbo ang lababo para isuka ang kung anumang maling nakain.

The fuck! I like drinking but I will never like the consequences after. But then... I didn't drank last night, for two weeks straight rather. Pero nasusuka ako ngayon na parang nakainom.

Agad akong nagmumog para matanggal ang lasang nakakasuka.

"What's wrong? Hangover?" I heard Rafa from the back.

"I haven't even go out yet," I managed to answer despite feeling trouble in my stomach.

"Hmm, panis na ba?" Rafa asked again then try the same food I ate.

"Hindi naman ah. And it's not even an hour since this foods arrived," dagdag pa niya.

"Try the mushroom soup..." I suggest since iyon ang kinain ko ng maramdaman ko ang pagkasuka.

Ginawa ni Rafa ang sinabi ko. Pagnasuka din siya baka kasalanan ko pa.

"H'wag na lang pala. Baka masuka ka din-"

"It's fine, too." Huli na dahil natikman na din ni Rafa.

Baka may nakain ako kanina at natapat lang ngayon?

To confirm, I tried the foods again specially the mushroom soup. Pero konting tikim pa lang ulit noon ay naramdaman ko na ulit ang tila pagbaliktad ng sikmura ko.

"Damn you, Rafa. It's spoiled already!" Angil ko kay Rafa habang nagmumumog ulit.

Pinaglololoko ako nitong bwisit na to!

"Amanda, what? It's really fine," si Rafa na natatawa pa.

"Damn you! Can't you see? Nakakasuka na nga ang lasa."

"Maybe you're just sensitive. I didn't know you don't eat this," sabay turo niya sa mushroom soup.

"Of course not! That's my favorite. Panis lang talaga 'yan."

"Okay, okay..." he held his hands up. Aktong sumusuko. "I need to go now. I'll be home late so just order food again for your dinner."

Inirapan ko na lang si Rafael. Nakalabas na siya ng kusina pero bumalik ulit.

"By the way... my tummy's just fine," pang-aasar nito. Inakto kong babalibagin siya ng tinidor kaya mabilis siyang lumabas na ulit.

I know I was spoiled with all the material things in the world but I'm no sensitive. I eat  the usual foods other people eat. Madalas pa nga kaming magfish balls sa labas ng school noong highschool. Panis lang talaga itong mushroom soup na in-order nj Rafa.

Gaya ng sinabi ni Rafael ay nagpadeliver na nga lang ako ng pagkain ko para sa dinner. At dahil gusto kong patunayan na hindi maselan ang tiyan ko gaya ng iniisip ni Rafa ay nag-order ulit ako ng mushroom soup from another restaurant.

Kahit na mag-isa lang naman akong kakain ay sinigurado kong maganda ang pagkaka-ayos ko ng mga pagkain sa lamesa. I know I'm not good at preparing foods but when it comes to table setting... I'll surely get an A plus.

Everything seems fine. The foods are nice and delicious. But when I got to have a spoon of the mushroom soup again, my stomach crumpled to pain.

Damn, what the hell?

Gaya kaninang tanghalian mabilis kong tinakbo ang pagitan ng lababo para mailabas ng masamang nakain.

Halos mabasa ang buong damit ko sa pagmamadali kong magmumog para lang matanggal ang lahat ng naiwang lasa ng mushroom soup.

Ano ba naman to? Pero sabi ni Rafa kanina ayos lang naman daw ang lasa at hindi panis. Pero sa panlasa ko ay pareho lang itong parang sira. Or maybe this is how their mushroom soup really taste? Kaya okay lang ang lasa kay Rafa? Kung ganoon ang pangit naman ng taste nila.

Halos hindi ko ma matignan ang mushroom soup sa lamesa. Nanghihinayang ako pero tinapon ko na lang talaga ito. Huli na ng maisip ko na pwede naman sanang nilagay ko na lang sa refrigerator para makain ni Rafa. Uh! Enough with thr mushroom soup.

Like what Rafa said, hatinggabi na nga ay wala pa siya. Hindi ko din naman siya hinihintay pero hindi ako makatulog. Parang may gusto ako na hindi ko maisip kung ano.

I tried watching films, eating chocolates and everything that caught my eye from the refrigerator but I still cannot figure out what I want.

I tried browsing on the internet, just randomly surfing stuffs but nothing got my attention.

This is insane!

Lalo akong nainip dahil mag-isa lang. Anong oras pa kaya uuwi si Rafa? Masyado ng gabi. I know this is usual pero naiinip na talaga ako.

Lumabas ako ng kwarto para manuod na lang ulit sa TV sa sala. Bakit din ba kasi hindi pa ako dalawin ng antok.

Still uneasy for unknown reason, napansin ko ang naiwang jacket ni Rafa sa may couch. Isa siguro sa pinamilian niyang suotin kanina. It is not the jacket that got my attention but the designs on it. It has a super cute watermelon designs all over.

So nice!

Parang may umilaw sa ulo ko. This is it! I want a watermelon. Para akong naging tutang uhaw sa tubig ng malaman ko kung ano talaga ang kanina ko pa gusto. Watermelon lang pala ang hindi ko maisip-isip kanina pa.

Good thing Rafa stock foods like fruits and veggies on the refrigerator. Sa tingin ko ay may watermelon doon.

At meron nga! Much to my delight. Hindi ko lang nakita kanina dahil nasa bandang likuran at hindi naman ito buo. It was already slice.

And when I got to taste it... cloud nine.

...