The Road Less Traveled (Prof./Student)

Chapter 19 - Doubts

Since our kiss in the cleaning room, we had no further contact for a week.

This made me feel quite self-conscious, to be honest. Having no idea what this meant to him, I started doubting his words. On the one hand, I wanted to believe him, believe that his feelings for me were real. But on the other hand, I questioned them a lot more often than I would have admitted. If I thought about him, I couldn't ignore the truth, that I knew almost nothing about him. And so did he know nothing about me either. 

There was not a question concerning the fact that we were both deeply attracted to one another. And the point that we weren't allowed to feel this way can certainly made everything even more exciting... For weeks we had suppressed these desires and only flirted through words or glances. But now that we had already kissed, I had no doubt that if we would have had the opportunity, it wouldn't have been hard to cross another line...

And of course, I wouldn't have objected but I was afraid that this would be the end of it all, that it was just a sexual attraction that eventually faded, at least from his side. 
Because I, I wanted so much more than that. I longed to get to know him. And I knew that he said that too but...not being able to meet publicly or to have a normal relationship...didn't that forced us into nothing but an affair? 

Lost in thoughts, I turned the corner and wanted to make my way to the cafeteria when I spotted him. But that was not what gave me an uneasy feeling in my chest, it was the woman next to him.

 They stood in the hallway and talked together. Still, I couldn't help but notice how she stood closer to him than appropriate, leaned into him when she said something and tried to flirt with him through her eyes and the way she played with her hair. When he, apparently,  had said something funny, she laughed and put her hand on his arm. That was enough for me. I didn't need to see more.

I quickly tried to pass them when he saw me. He immediately seemed to forget about the woman that was standing next to him:

"Miss White, I was looking for you. Do you have a minute?"

I looked at him, then I looked at her before my gaze stopped at her hand that was still touching him.

"I'm sorry. I'm in a hurry", I stated and nodded at him as a goodbye: "Professor." Then I looked at her.

"I'm Professor Kingston", she said with a fake smile.

"Nice to meet you", I replied with gritted teeth and made my way through the door to the cafeteria. I caught sight of Julie who was waiting with our food and quickly made my way over to her to sit down with a loud sigh. 

"Let me guess, something happened with your man?", Julie started and I gave her a mean glance.

"He isn't my man. That's the problem. For the public he still remains this good-looking, single man that every woman is after! And just for your information, I don't think that chances are high that he even will be mine one day", I replied harshly.

"Are you sure that you mean nothing to him?", Julie asked suspiciously.

I looked at her with narrow eyes:"What do you mean by that?"

She smiled mischievously:"Well...someone's just entered the cafeteria and I think he is looking for you. Yes! I'm right. Now he has found our table and makes his way over to us. Oh my god, Liz! He-"

"I'm sorry to interrupt you ladies. Julie, right? Do you mind if I talk to Liz alone for a moment?", he asked behind me.

"Yes"
"No", we both said at the same time and I glared at her but she just stood up and moved to another table while Professor Cullen took the seat across from me.