35 - opening night

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Just want to say if you're going to listen to the song above, play it after the concert

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Just want to say if you're going to listen to the song above, play it after the concert. That's where I picture it!

I watched from the wings as the stadium quickly filled up

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I watched from the wings as the stadium quickly filled up. Trent and his friends stood backstage, doing the pre-show rituals with Aria happily joining in.

"We heading out there?" Hudson asks, appearing beside me as we watch the crowd. "Yeah we should. Trent reserved us those seats at the front." I tell him, pointing at five seats at the front.

"Come on then.." he says, kissing my temple as my friends head out. I pick Aria up, walking over to Trent. I go to open my mouth but he stops me. "Not now. We'll do our goodbyes later." He whispers and I agree, kissing him briefly before we head out into the crowd.

The people we walked past recognised us. I mean we were always getting photographed. So it's not surprising. Just surreal. Only they were all so kind. Waving to Aria who loved every second of it. She would wave back and say hello to everyone. She even pointed to the stage and told one girl her dad would be on there soon.

It was so cute!

As we finally reached our seats, the house lights dimmed. Everyone began screaming, a roaring applause echoing through the room as I watched his band come out. Chris comes to the front of the stage in front of us, waving at Aria before picking up his guitar.

Out of the silence, they began playing the introduction music as Trent appeared on stage. The screams got louder, Aria's probably being the loudest. "Go daddy!!" She screamed out.

His eyes land on us, blowing a kiss at Aria. "I love you." He mouthed over to the both of us.

And with that, the show began. We all sang along to every song he played. Even the new ones that no one else knew but us. Probably because that's all Aria and I force him to play.

Midway through the show, Chris played a soft instrumental on his guitar as Trent walked to the front of the stage, taking a seat. "I'm going to take a minute to get personal. I hope that's ok." He said as the crowd roared.

"Music is my life. It's always been my life. And I'm blessed to have every single one of you in my life. I wouldn't be sat on this stage if it wasn't for your support. Touring to see you all? It makes all the downsides to stardom worth it. I mean look at us now. We're heading out on the biggest tour of my life." He says, cheers getting louder.

"But this is one of the hardest tours I have ever started. Before, there was nothing tying me down to one place. But now I'll be leaving my family." He said, gesturing to all of us as we stood front row.

Aww's came from the crowd, as tears pooled up in my eyes. "I guess I wanted to take a minute to appreciate what I have. Every single person in this room. And all those who listen to my music. Who support me. I love you all." He says, walking to the edge of the stage.

I pick up Aria, us both walking over to him as he kisses the top of her head. Then placing a loving kiss on mine before going back on stage. "Ok let's get back to the music."

The show went by too quickly, the arena emptying out as we head backstage. Dread filling my stomach because I know this was the moment. Trent said his goodbyes to everyone. My friends and Aria. Aria cried. A lot. But eventually Hudson managed to get her out the stadium and to the car.

Grace said her and Ellie would drive Aria home. They said she can stay at their house tonight. I just don't know what I'll be feeling.

I stood outside the tour bus with Trent, biting down hard on my lip to stop myself from crying as his hand strokes my cheek. "Dont.." he whispers, and I try so hard not to.

"We're going to be ok. I swear to you, ok?" He says quietly, his voice breaking as he chokes back his own tears. I just nod, because I know the second I speak, I'll fall apart. "It's just a few months. And then I'll be home."

"I love you.." is all I could find the courage to whisper, making him pull me tightly into his chest. "Trent, sorry man but we have to get on the road." Chris says before getting back on the bus.

"I love you too." He whispers back, kissing me deeply before walking on the bus. My feet couldn't move. I just stood and watched as the bus rolled away slowly. I saw him looking out the window as he started to roll past me, my hand clutching at my shirt as I couldn't hold the tears back any longer.

I broke down sobbing. I know he could see me. But I couldn't help it. I was watching him drive away, knowing he'd be gone for a long time.

My eyes watched as I saw him start begging someone to stop the bus, his sad eyes locked on mine. But it didn't stop. I told Chris before they left to not let him off that bus. To just drive, no matter what he says.

Hudson appeared at my side, his arms wrapping around me as I sobbed into his chest. "I know..I know." He said, rubbing my back as the bus disappeared from our view.

"I can't..it hurts.." I whisper out, Hudson guiding me into his car before he drives me home. It feels like just yesterday that Trent bought that house. And now I'd be going back to it empty.

"Want me to come in?" Hudson asked but I shook my head, feeling emotionally drained and slightly numb by this point. "Thanks for dropping me off." Is all I quietly said before I climbed out the car and went straight inside.

I shut the front door, my back leaning against it as I looked around the house.

God this was going to be a long few months. He was going to miss so much. It's the start of September. And he's going to be gone for months.

He's going to miss my birthday in October. Thanksgiving. The lead up to Christmas. Even New Years because he's performing.

I'm so incredibly proud of him. And I know he's doing what makes him happy. But it just doesn't help dull the sadness I'm feeling tonight.

That's all I get though. Tonight. I'll let out all my emotions. Then tomorrow I carry on. Because that's what you do as a mother. You find a way to carry on for your children. She's going to miss Trent too. Her feelings come before mine. Always.

We'll be fine..

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