remorse | a jenkai story

His Apparition

Jennie finally freed herself to the balcony as she puts her hand in her chest. She had to make sure her heart's beating. She slowly allowed herself to calm down and sighs. It was the first time after the incident that she felt a panic attack. The only time she felt that it was real was in her dreams, but never did it happen in real life until now. 

She can't believe what just happened. If this is a dream, somebody better wake me up, she thought. But no matter how much she thinks about it, there's no way this is a dream. Her dreams of him were always about the memories she had with him. She gets a little annoyed all of a sudden. Did Rosé not know any of this? Or was this all part of Jisoo's plan? She shakes her head at the thought and sigh while watching the view from Seoul above. 

"Jennie-yah! Are you okay?" Jennie turns around to see Tae Hyung running towards her. He takes a good look at her and cups her cheeks in his hands. "Are you hurt? Did you hurt yourself?" Tae Hyung said and Jennie took his hands away from her face. 

"I'm fine." Jennie said lying. How can she, when the person she couldn't get over was just there in front of her? 

Tae Hyung sighs. "Did you know he was gonna be there?" Jennie asks and he shook his head

"I swear to god I don't. He doesn't even remember me." Tae Hyung said running his hand through his hair in frustration. 

Jennie turns around to look at Tae Hyung over what he just said. "What do you mean he doesn't remember you?" Jennie ask

"I asked Chan Yeol about it and back then Chan Yeol broke his leg while riding his motorcycle. He had to stay in the hospital and that's where he met Kai. He said Kai lost all of his memory due to a car accident. He mentioned it's even a miracle Kai's able to made it because the chances are very low." Tae Hyung said 

When Jennie heard this, she bent down. She was trying to process everything Tae Hyung just said and she couldn't believe him. It made sense there was no news about him after all this time. She remembered she would watch all runaway shows after her disappearance to see if he's doing well. Years after years trying to see if he's doing alright, and turns out he had all of his memory wiped after the accident. 

Her thoughts were redirected to what Tae Hyung mentioned about how it's a miracle for Kai to even survive because the chances are low. She suddenly gasped and puts her hand to cover her lips. She couldn't help but think how hard it must've been on him, lying in a coma for so long. She imagined his lifeless body lying on the hospital bed with tubes giving him support for air so he can breathe. "He didn't remember you, Jennie-yah." Tae Hyung said 

Jennie woke up from her thought and turn to look at Tae Hyung. "What?" She said in a small voice

"He was asking who you are when you left." Tae Hyung said. Jennie slowly gets up

"He..he asked about me?" Tae Hyung nods. He knows his best friend is in shock with what happened, but she needs to know every thing. 

"I can't go back there and act like everything's okay, but I can't leave. This is my best friend's engagement party. I shouldn't be like this." Jennie said frustrated while she paced back and forth

Jennie asked Tae Hyung to leave her alone for a bit and let everyone know she'll be back shortly. She can't leave the place like a coward, not when it's her best friend's happy day. She can't be this selfish after what she has done multiple of times when someone triggered her with the memory of Kai. 

Jennie couldn't help but feel relieved seeing him in such a healthy state. The memory of his scars and blood scattered all over the place was brutal to her. She can't help but smile at the memory of his appearance. He looks exactly like he was before, Jennie thought multiple of times. The way he flashes his sweet smile and how dashing he looks with a tux on. Jennie caught herself remembering on his hair. How it was half parted on his left side while the rest was pushed back and how streaks of ash grey are visible to the eyes. He must've dyed it, Jennie said to herself.