Where I'm Now

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AN INTRODUCTION TO KIM JONGIN

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AN INTRODUCTION TO KIM JONGIN

I view the world as a nuisance; a sadist, torturing beautiful creatures like my creator. 

Him and I might seem like we don't get along, but we used to live in harmony as one, uniting both mind and heart as one body. We like to keep it synchronize, a life we viewed as peaceful. 

Our world fell apart when we lost our memories. 

We were trying so hard to remember but grew frustrated as time goes by. The doctors told us it might be temporary, but they did not guarantee our memories will return due to the heavy collision to the head. But still, they encourage us to slowly try and hopefully the small practices during our time in the hospital might be useful for our recovery. 

It was brought to no avail as the progress grew less and less effective, and both of us knew there was no point in recalling a memory that was made for us to forget. 

We hated psychologists, mainly because we were set up with one and quiet frankly, hated her approach in trying to cure us. Don't get me wrong, but we've tried countless of times to ask the hospital to put us up with another psychologist we viewed reliable to this one, but they denied us, stating they don't have the resource to hire another psychologist. And so, for a couple of months we put up with her without knowing our growing hatred towards her kind. 

Time goes by and so does ours in the hospital. The nurse had kept our belongings and as we finally arrived to our so-called apartment, we can't believe it. It has the most beautiful view of the Eiffel Tower with a quiet neighborhood surrounding us. It kept us thinking of which field of work did we worked in to be able to earn such beautiful place like this. I remember how we walked down the small lake in front of our place, starring into the endless view of the sunset setting behind the Eiffel Tower. 

I know what we felt at that moment. The sun might be a mere sun that was set to shine and fall, but to us it was the warmth we crave. It has been months since we've been kept on four walls and we hated how Paris was gloomy during our time there. Though as time goes by, we grew fond of the rain and the comforting feeling behind every drop. But the sun was something else. It was burning our cold skin, almost as if it was saying, "I'm here for you." 

We had no one but ourselves and the lonely feeling of our massive apartment. He was restless, trying to calm myself since I always agitate him to put himself out there and find a job because simply, our house bills are not going to pay on its own. I should've understood him better but instead, I pushed him to the point where he had me exiled and split our personalities into two. 

Kai was his main persona, someone who has no sense of thoughts but feeds in his desires and listen to his heart while I, Kim Jongin-- who took his original name as a revenge of my banishment-- lose the upper hand because Kai couldn't handle how logical I am. But he always knew I was right. Despite thinking I was a nuisance to himself, he can't help and take some words of mine and place it to his career. 

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