〘Chapter 27〙

62 5 0
                                    

Then Felix was on the couch, tired from all of the medications, mostly anxiety. He was kinda just waiting for his release - aka coffee.

"Hey uhm excuse me sir? You ordered something from us." A male voice said, just like any waiter or cashier ever would talk.

Lix looked up, and of course it was Chris who was playing a joke on him.

"Sorry I'm not in the mood for jokes... I just wanna sleep.." the younger complained and heard a quiet 'boo'. That definetly wasn't Chris.

"Aww c'mon man what kind of party is this?!" An annoyed guy complained from the other side of the room, his footsteps rushing to the couch.

Lix immediately held his arms over his head, it was just an automatic reaction from his body to protect himself against any possible danger, even though he knew that whoever this person was wasn't going to harm him. If they were in Lina's house they had to be one of their friends.

"Sorry didn't wanna scare you mate.." Patrick said, the younger could finally recognise his voice, and sat down on the couch next to his friend, pulling him up onto his lap.

"Bro I need my damn coffee or I'm gonna be grumpy for the rest of the day." Felix complained and hugged his friend's neck, whimpering from the pain only a slight movement caused.

"Did you take your meds, Lixie?" Lina asked and he just heard a pill container ruttle. This sound gave him PTSD, because of everything he connected it with.

But he didn't wanna stop the 'party'. He felt bad, really bad, but he still thought he'd feel worse if he sent everyone home.

His psychologist, who was actually the same as his girlfriend's, had told him to just act selfish, to just do whatever his body says feels right, do everything to prevent another rush of anxiety, but he couldn't do anything. Not in front of his friends.

He didn't want them to know, even if they most definetly all did.

Felix suddenly got up and rushed over to Lina, grabbing her hands and pulling her into the bathroom, where he collapsed into a massive pile of tears.

Of course the others also followed them, and Felix only managed to say "Too many people" in between his tears. Li shewed the others away and started comforting him.

"I'm sorry...so sorry..." Was all Lix could say. He was a terrible boyfriend! His girlfriend was only home for a few hours and he had made her worry so many times already.

She had her own problems, which were arguably far worse than his, so he felt he was only a burden more the girl had to carry.

"Sweetheart..There's nothing you've gotta be sorry for, okay? It's not your fault that everything around you turns into anxiety triggers. Do you want me to send the others home? No one will be mad at you or me, I promise."

"No..! I don't want the others to know I'm such a pussy.." "Lix don't call yourself that. They know that you have anxiety, Chris watched two attacks happen, remember? They'll understand. Remember, be selfish. None of this is your fault."

He finally nodded, but as soon as the girl wanted to stand up to explain everyone hat to leave, he pulled her back down.

"Maybe..just stay here..for a while... Maybe... I can...calm down..?" He begged. The girl, however, shook her head. "No Lixie... I'm making the decision to send them home, for your and my own good. Okay?"

Now he shook his head, he didn't want that. But did he even know what he wanted? No, not at all. His girlfriend just left him alone while talking to the others, and ended up sending them home.

Felix made his way back to the couch, and saw that his friends had left him a cup of caramel coffee.

Lina noticed how her boyfriend was staring at it, so she gave it to him, not knowing why he didn't just grab it himself.

The name on the coffee said 'Yongbok', and Felix was surprised the person working at Starbucks could actually spell such a foreign, and for Australians probably also weird sounding name. To be honest, it was weird for some Koreans, too.

"Lixie let's cuddle." "No...I don't wanna..." Right away, alarm clocks started ringing in Li's head. He had never turned down a hug. Never.

"That's not like you. What's wrong?" She asked, but no answer came from Felix.

"Hey Lix..." Li sat down next to her boyfriend, put an arm around his waist and pulled him closer, so his hands were basically on her lap.

"You know that you can tell me everything, right? Even if it's the most stupid thing ever and you're super embarassed about it, trust me I'm the last person to laugh at you. Don't worry about my problems, we have to talk about yours too."

He shrugged. "It's nothing...I wanna cuddle now.." he said in a very quiet voice that almost made him sound hopeless. Like he would never get another hug again in his life.

"Baby... don't think I'm mad, alright? No one is mad at you because of what happened just now and I'm most definitely not mad at you because you didn't wanna cuddle, I just want to know why not?"

Again, he didn't answer and just started to pull her closer. His breath was shakey, and he was probably going to break out in tears if anything triggered him.

"Lixie don't be sad. If you're not ready to talk about it, then I'll wait but you have to tell me eventually." "Yeah... I need cuddles now.."

His Last Hope part 2 | A Lee Felix FF (sometimes 18+) FINISHED!!!Where stories live. Discover now