You're dead to me

Chapter forty: Till Death Brings Us Apart

My heart pounds and I look everywhere trying to find my cellphone. Frustrated, I press my hand onto Giovannis chest and hold on for dear life.

Finally my fingers graze a touchscreen. I push some numbers and hold it not my ear.

"Briar, who's there?". I breathe fast and my eyes are focused on Giovannis lifeless face. "Br-r-riar???": I stutter and hear shifting and a toddlers screaming in the background. "Caroline what happened?". She asks alarmed. "Uhm, you- you have to send an ambulance to the De'Bardis mansion. Giovanni is lethally injured, hurry up". I manage to press out and decline the phone call.

"Hey, hey everything will be alright okay". I whisper and let his head meat my collarbone. I can feel his heart beating extremely slowly and heavy. Oh fuck, if Giovanni dies, than I will be free and easy meat for other mafias. Nothing is as amusing as a widow with a promised bequest.

I nipple on my lip and wait patiently for the ambulance.

***

I run down the hall, bright lights beaming in my eyes and I rush to the front desk. "Giovanni, Giovanni De'Bardi where is he located?".

"I'm sorry Ma'am, I cannot give you information for that". I shake my head and my chin trembles, I will loose him, man I will loose the most important man in my life. My hands start to shake and I take in a deep breath. Panic waits to be claiming my veins. "I'm his wife".

"Oh well than, please go this way". Another nurse says and leads me to the top floor, where are much less people around here. "That's the privat district we arranged after Mr. De'Bardi junior chose to donate to us". She says smiling and I nod. But nothing that she says is sticking with me, I want to know him in safety.

She stops at the number 5521 and opens the door for me. After the ambulance had taken him, I had to wait at least two hours for Tyler to get the special information where Giovanni had been located.

My heart starts beating faster and I feel like I'm gonna pass out. Giovanni lays in a bed, attached to a lot of machines and I observe the heartbeat. He seems steady but still unconscious. The nurse lets me have privacy and I seat myself next to him.

"Hey mi amore". I mumble and wish a strain of hair out of his face. Sweat covers him and he has a fever. "You know, just for your information. If you let me here alone I will haunt you in hell". He looks so peaceful and I hear my sniff. Hot tears fall down my cheeks and I press my lips together, my chin can't stop trembling. "Please don't leave me, Giovanni". I lean my forehead on his and close my eyes, my tears fall on his lips. "Please don't leave me, mi amore". I whisper and entangle our fingers together. I lean back and force myself to look at the ceiling.

"I-I...uhm. This is very very hard for me, but... I never said to you why I am like this, you know, pushing people away from me and stuff. It's actually not that hard to guess, but my father did that to me. And maybe you're confused why I was so shocked when your father, my father in law, had said that we have to get a baby. The thing is, Giovanni". My vision blurs and I curse myself to keep on blinking. My voice falls into a scratchy pathetic sound, overloaded with tears.

"The thing is, I am infertile. I cannot have any children, that's the main reason why it was for my father so easy to transform me into a machine, than it is with others. He always said to me that I can't be a women if I cannot have any children and because I surely cannot be a man, he said to me...". I inhale.

"He said to me, that I have to become something way worse, I had to become a monster so people wouldn't want me to have any follows referred as baby's". I breath out and turn to look at him, but my breath caught in my lungs. He stares at me, with absolutely no expression.

"A...I'm so sorry". I break the eye contact and look at our hands. "I can imagine that you would want a heir and I'm sorry that I can't give it to you. This mafia will die with you and me". His fingers slip under my chin and he forces me to look at him. "Caroline". He says stern and I just know that he will blame it on me, but that's fair, I am the mistaken thing not he.

"Do not thing any second of the day, that I will stop loving you, just because you are infertile!". My eyes widen and I part my lips. "You...you love me?". He smiles weakly. "I thought you already had figured that out by now". He quietly laughs. His hand cups my cheek and I put mine on his. My mouth pulls up in a loving smile.

"I don't expect you to say it too, but I hope you feel it in there". He points at my heart. He's right, I cannot say it, not yet, but I believe when the moment is right that I will have no doubt to confess. I nod and snuggle into his chest very carefully. "Don't suit yourself mi amore, my broken chest will always have room for a stubborn Italian assassin". I chuckle and close my eyes.

I love the sound of his heart beating steady. My mind drifts off to a dream that I used to have every now and then. Me and Giovanni holding a little charming in our hands, fragile, crying looking baby, with his black orbs and my temper. I smile to myself in secret. Giovanni kisses my head and rubs gently my arm. "I will love you till death brings us apart and even longer than that". He might thought I already fell asleep, but my heart just got a second too fast.

*
Booooommm, dropped the bomb. Not gonna lie I'm kind of impressed that I went a whole different way with the last chapter. Japan? Really? Well I guess see us there. Please tell me how are y'all feel about that plot, it's not the mind blowing thing ever, but believe me we get there eventually;)

Keep the votes up high my pumpkins<3