The Mallapers Are Rising: A Rejected Werewolf Story

Chapter Nineteen

Ryan's Point Of View

Everything has changed. 

I feel helpless and weak like a newborn pup. I remember a time I thought Leyla not being here would be the best thing. I remember a time when I wished she would disappear. I remember a time when I wished that I didn't have to breathe the same air as her. I remember wishing that my father would leave and I never had to look at him again. I never understood proverbs before but the only one that crosses my mind at this moment is you should be careful what you wish for. 

My chest hurts, my body aches, my wolf is angry but I am happy to wither his hatred. He hates me for what I have done, he hates me for losing his mate. The only thing he is happy about is that she escaped the hell that I had created for. It's funny, how I used to love the life I lived but now all I feel is trapped in a prison that I can't escape. 

It's been over a week since Leyla escaped and although apart of me is angry that she left, a part of me just can't blame her. The sacrifice of my soul mate allowed my wolf to finally resurface and although I count the blessings that he is now speaking to me. He has nothing but bad things to say, his voice in my head is a constant reminder of the mess I have created. 

Once upon a time, I revelled in the worship, praise and comfort that Elisha had provided. Now all I feel is shame and self-loathing. Every time she touches, I feel myself flinch. I knew she wasn't my true mate and although I had done nothing but hurt and betray my Leyla. I couldn't bring myself to be the same person I was. 

Elisha was desperately trying to seduce me, every time she would run her long fingertips up and down my arm. I couldn't help the bile rise to my throat. My wolf would grow in anger at the audacity of the she-wolf trying to be with someone who wasn't his mate. He couldn't understand how she could betray her true mate. It was the one thing I had learned about my wolf. He was loyal and dedicated to Leyla. He displayed traits which were completely opposite to me. 

Trying to evade Elisha was becoming more and more difficult each day. She was determined to have me. No matter what I tried, no matter how dismissive I was she was still adamant of sharing my space. Following me, like she was some lost pup. My wolf growled that she wasn't a lost puppy but more of a leech sucking the life out of us. I eventually came up with the excuse and lie that I wanted to be worthy of her and I wanted to wait till the full moon when we marked and mated. 

My wolf only became agitated at my words and angry at her happiness when I confirmed I would mark her. It was only when I explained I was keeping appearances that he was appeased by my answer. He heard the sincerity of my promise that I wouldn't mate her. He understood I was willing to do anything to get Leyla back. 

I have sat in the gardens where I would often find Leyla when she stayed at the pack house. Hoping to catch a glimpse of her scent that mixed with the wildflowers but it was only wishful thinking. I pondered to myself, where did I go wrong in my life? How did I get to this point? How did I create the distance and space with my mate? 

It wasn't just me that had changed but my mother was a completely different entity. She was more cold and callous. She was like a Sargent preparing for a war. The palace was littered with guards, there was more training and more meetings. She was a control freak. Part of me questioned whether this was a reaction to my father being missing but all my wolf did was scoff. He was adamant that she was always like this. 

The meetings she had, she never let me attend which puzzled me. She would emphasis that it wasn't my fight and would dismiss me at every chance. I was angered by her actions, she was already undermining as future King. Shouldn't we know what is being planned? Her excuse was that she wanted me to focus on my relationship with Elisha. She would give me this disapproving look and tell me that I needed to make it up to my betrayed mate.