CHAOS | Chanbaek +18

Long time no see-Author's note

Hello, babes!!! 

I am writing these few words with shaky hands, but a heart that can burst of too much happiness at any second now. 

I stopped writing in this book two years ago, and since then, I've been feeling empty.  Chaos was, and still is, probably one of my biggest and most important works for me, an idea that came up in my mind years ago, and that I am still working on to this day. 
When I first published the first few chapters here I was more than scared, almost terrified by the many worries that were running through my head. I always thought that people will hate the characters, that people might feel attacked by it, or maybe some will be triggered. One of my biggest fears was that people won't understand what I am writing, and still is to this day. 
When I stopped posting, I stopped because every time I'd come back to check the older chapters, I'd see awful errors, grammatical errors that made me hate myself for even trying to write. I became so self-conscious that I started to ask myself how you guys perceive me after reading such things and I hated the idea. So I stopped. 
I only came back here now and then to check if the story is still here. I tried to come back many times. I wasn't ready. 
Last night, after many months of being inactive, I finally checked the account again. 

Over 150 notifications popped up, all from people who are reading the story at the moment. My eyes instantly filled with heavy tears as I started to read all your comments, comments that I adore reading over and over again. 

I was speechless. 

Every time I thought about coming back I told myself that I am still not good enough. That I still have to work on my English, that I need a better plan. I even thought that I will never continue this. 

But I can't leave Chaos behind. 

I decided last night to finally come back with this story. I finally feel ready and good enough to continue Chanyeol and Baekhyun's story. 

It won't be easy and I know it. I will have to correct all the chapters already posted and make all the needed changes, but I know it will be worth it in the end. 

If there is something that I don't want to lose, is your comments on all these chapters. Those are so important for me, as they are the reason why I decided to continue writing. So, most probably, nothing will be deleted, but just reposted in a much better version. I don't know exactly when, but it will happen soon. 

Thank you so much for all the kind words in the comments or private messages. You don't know how much they mean to me. 

Thank you for reading my story. 

I will see you soon. 

-Berry