24 ➹ slipping through

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 tw: eating disorder

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tw: eating disorder

CALEB IS CONSTANTLY monitoring everything I do. It's like I have him breathing down my neck to see if I'm eating right - I never even knew there was a wrong way to eat, let alone that I was doing it.

My phone rings on the counter of the art room and I go to decline it thinking it's Caleb. His messages have been coming in all day - well, him and the group chats, I've ignored both. I halter though when I see dad's contact pops up instead. I smile at the photo, it's of dad and me when I was in the first grade. Our faces are painted like tigers, and we've got our hands up roaring at the camera.

I press accept, taking a seat on the stool and placing my brush on the pallet. "Sagey!" Dad's voice greets, his happiness a parallel of my own.

"Dad, how are you?" I try my best to sound like how I usually do. My attempt dies at the end of my statement the second I make eye contact with one of the displayed artworks. It's definitely my favourite out of all of them - Sometimes I come in the room just to stare at it.

It's a sculpture of two people hugging, and they've got so many emotions written across their faces I'm in awe of how a human made that. I stand up subconsciously and head towards it holding my phone in my right hand, since there's no paint in my palm.

Dad talks about how he's good, how he misses me and that the house is quiet without my presence. "I mean, your mothers been a mess." I zone out from the image at the statement, confused.

"Mom, a mess? She didn't even want kids dad, isn't this the best thing that's ever happened to her?" Both of her kids out of the house, no messes she has to attend to, no kids she has to chase with wet mops - no stains she has to clean or get dad to clean for her.

Dad sighs on the other side, "she didn't want kids until she had Ivy, and then you came along and she really wanted kids then."

"Yeah?" I catch myself in the reflection in one of the mirrors and I notice a small smile creeping up onto my face.

"Of course, we always want you, Sagey. You're our pick."

"Thanks dad." I really needed that.

"Anytime, you know I'm always in your corner. Even though Atlas is my favourite."

I roll my eyes, feeling lighter than before. "Hey!"

His laughter rings out from the other side, "truth hurts, how's school? swimming? your new art piece?" He bombards all at once.

"School's fine. Swimming's fine. Art is..." I look back at my piece, look at all the darker shades I've started to incorporate. "Fine, though I think I'm gonna put the painting on reserve and start back with clay." My eyes flicker back to my favourite work and I reread the name.

EVERETTE LAW (b. ****)
slipping through my fingers
clay
no comment.

"Whatever you want, Sage." Dads never pressured me to be perfect but I know he wants me to be effortless in my endeavours.

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