Lost Soul ☯︎︎ (ATEEZ AU) Yunho x Reader

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| WORD COUNT: 1.4K

You woke up in the sickbay before sitting up and looking around to see a familiar head of dark brown hair with strands of baby blue in the back of his hair in the corner of the room. "San?" You said. The boy turned around and looked at you. He rushed to your side as he grabbed a chair to sit down next to you. "Ji Ah, are you okay? You suddenly just passed out earlier. Did you not eat today?" He asked, vividly concerned about you as he rubbed your back.

"I did, it's just..." You stopped yourself from saying anything further as you looked away. "What are you not telling me, Ji Ah?" He asked. What if he thinks I've totally lost it? You thought. "Ji Ah?" You got interrupted from your thoughts once again before he placed his index finger and thumb on your chin to make you look at him. You stared into his blue eyes.

You can see the worry, the sincerity in his eyes. He's concerned about you and wants to know your troubles, what makes you like this. He looked for answers as he stared deeply in your eyes, waiting for you to speak.

You bit your lip as the anxiety continued to drown your body. He grabbed your hand as he squeezed it, waiting for you, trying to calm you in the process. "I don't need my little assistant to die without me knowing the reason why, and also you constantly have running noses." He said calmly with a cool voice.

It made your body relax as you calmed down, taking in the air around you. You let out a sigh before speaking. "I keep hearing voices..." You mumble with a shaky voice. San still heard you as he looked at you with shock written on his face. "Y-You can?" He asked, making sure that what you said was what he heard.

You nodded your head. "Yeah...and they keep saying complete nonsense." You sighed as you felt tears begin to form. "And I hate it so much honestly...I wish it could s-stop." Your voice cracked as you looked down as you saw a couple of tears drop down onto your lap. San pulled you into a hug as he rubbed your back lightly.

"Everything will be alright. I promise, we'll get to the bottom of this sooner or later." He said, trying to reassure you about the possibilities. But what if not? What if you can't figure this out and I'll just suffer more with this all? "Okay..." You said, lying. You didn't want to worry him anymore. He's helped you quite enough. You didn't want to put him through the trouble anymore.

You heard a knocking on the door as San quickly got off of you as you wiped your tears away quickly. "Come in!" San called out for the guest behind the door. The door creaked open, exposing the navigator. "Hey San, captain wants to speak with us." Yeosang's eyes then darted to you. "Ji Ah! You're awake!" He smiled as he walked over to you. "Everything alright? We heard a thud on deck and we all came to see what the commotion was, and then once we arrived, we saw San trying to shake you awake." Yeosang informed you.

You looked towards San who was staring right back at you . "She didn't eat today." San replied. Yeosang glares at you. "Ji Ah, you're already as skinny to the bone, you need to gain some weight." Yeosang said as he hit your shoulder rather hard. "Ow!" You yelped glaring at the older male. San pushes Yeosang lightly in a playful manner. "He just woke up, cut him some slack." San defends you. Yeosang chuckled.

"Anyways, since you're up Ji Ah, let's get going to go see what captain wants. We don't want to be late, we all know how much he hates that." Yeosang said quickly before making his way to the door.

San stood up as he helped you. Once Yeosang left he turned back to you. "After this meeting, make sure you go in your cabin and readjust your bindings, and this time, don't forget to barricade it. We can't keep having them figuring out your true identity." He wrapped his arm around your shoulder to aid you to walk across the deck. "I know...." You responded like a child getting scolded by their mother.

"Is that fine with you all?" Hongjoong asked. Jongho looked at you with that same cold gaze that you're not used to just yet. You still want to know why he's so harsh to you and yet to trust you. You looked away quickly because if you continue to keep eye contact with him you feel like you may melt in your spot.

"You want me to babysit them basically?" San said. You heard some of the others chuckle as you and Jongho stared at him with a dark gaze. He shied away like a cat. "Sorry...sorry." He said, making you and Jongho roll your eyes in unison. "You both are creepily in unison. Are you guys using some telepathy or something?" You heard Mingi say. "I would rather sleep in the same room with Wooyoung than that." Jongho said as he looked at Mingi before quickly stealing a cold glance at you.

You looked away. "Well, I don't care." Hongjoong said. "San and Ji Ah have the most knowledge of herbs, foods, and materials, while you are the strongest here on Treasure." Hongjoong said directly to Jongho. "If you want to go against what I say, I can go ahead and maroon you off." Hongjoong said, making the atmosphere tense up.

You looked over at Jongho who's body was stiff. "Nevermind..." Jongho huffed before turning off and leaving. Hongjoong and the rest of the crew chuckled as you just sat in confusion. "Sorry about that Ji Ah. He'll soon warm up to ya, he has a history." Hongjoong said as he looked over at you.

"It's fine..." You said a bit out of it. "But it would be good if you manage to go and get supplies and trade some stuff with your clothing that you don't need." He said. You contemplated for a little until you nodded your head. The others smiled at your decision. "Thanks Ji Ah. Make sure you eat and get some sleep since you're leaving bright and early tomorrow morning directly at sunrise." The captain said.

You hummed to let him know that you agreed to his plan to gather all the supplies you all needed to last a couple of weeks to reach the village Metalli. "Okay. You and San can leave now. I need to speak with these boys about how we're going to spend our time hiding." He said, talking about the other four men in the room.

You nodded before you got up with San as you thanked him and left for your cabin. "I'm going to take a chaulk." You said. "Wake me up when it's time for dinner." You finished. San was about to speak but you quickly disappeared in your room. You barricaded the door as you quickly took off your binding and finally breathed clearly.

You feel more air enter your lungs and exit with ease instead of feeling pressure on your chest almost everyday feeling like you may pass out.

You sighed before you put the bindings back on and your shirt back on as you plopped onto your hammock as it swung side to side by the force of your weight.

You sighed deeply as you looked up at your ceiling before you closed your eyes to fall asleep. You felt uneasy. The head guard's cold gaze from earlier flashed back in your head suddenly. They stayed there as if it was on pause. You looked at it more. The blank gaze in his eyes. It was cold, too cold. There was nothing but coldness. It made you shiver in your place.

Then it turned black. In your empty thoughts. Nothing happy, nothing sad. Just torture. You wanted to escape this space but you couldn't, you felt captive by it. You hated it here and you wanted out. Even if you screamed loudly, no one would hear you. It was just you sitting there in a ball crying.

The more you stayed the worse it got. You heard sobbing, wooden planks creaking from the pressure of people walking on them. But it was hollow, like some platform. You heard the screams, wails, the words that lingered in your head. "Monsters like you should be suspended..." You covered your ears as you looked away from him. You still remember how they're faces turned pale as they got their souls taken from them without a reason. Only because of the greed of mortals. You made that same promise over and over again. "No human can be trusted..."