Dangerous Desire{DNF}

28-A Mistake

-fitting song(s) for the chapter: sad edit audios bcs it's 2:22am-

Badboyhalo

I shouldn't have done it.

I shouldn't have let my fear of George get the best of me.

I let someone I truly cared about get caught in the hands of someone who used to promise me the world.

I knew that Dream would be able to protect himself but I couldn't help but wonder.

Is he going to survive? Or did I kill Dream by leaving him with George?

I stopped at a building, leaning onto its walls and trying to catch my breath from all the panic.

I was having a panick attack.

My vision got a little bit blurry.

My brrath got fainter.

My hands were shaking.

I struggled to keep my body in a steady position.

The thoughts of murdering Dream and letting George never left my head.

It was night time meaning that noone was around.

I was having a panic attack and nobody could help me.

I hated myself.

For being a coward.

Falling for George's lies all over again.

Valuing my life over the ones from the people I care about.

Dream and I had our ups and downs but I still loved him like a younger sibling.

Like family.

And now.

I killed that family.

A distant yell was hearable from the woods I left Dream in.

I scrunched my face, holding back tears and squeezed my fist as hard as I could.

I was an am emotional wreck.

Why can't I feel normal for once? Why do I have to feel happy one day, mad the other and extremely depressed another day?

Why was it so hard for me to leave Dream in the woods?

Why couldn't I bring myself to go back to check on Dream?

Was it because I was afraid that George might kill me?

As a traitor, I felt bad.
As a friend, I felt horrible.
And as someone Dream trusted, I feel like throwing up from the hatred towarss myself.

I sat on the cold street floor and calmed myself down.

Slowly, counting back from 20.
Letting my thoughts not get the better of me.

20.

You don't deserve a life.

19.