Better Choices (bwwm)

T W E N T Y O N E

I V Y

Ingrid goes to the same high school that I went to and in no way was that high school organized.

Meaning that she was supposed to graduate the week after I do but now she's graduating this Friday.

It's been a week since the carnival and now Alex and I are home packing up some stuff to take on our trip there.

It's only Thursday afternoon and I shouldn't pack because I have stuff at home but I'm not staying at my house.

I'm staying at a hotel with Alex because if I have to be in that neighborhood for a day I at least want to be in a nice place.

Kimani and Sasha begged to go but I didn't want to make it more awkward than it is. Especially after the Funeral. 

THREE WEEKS AGO.

I V Y

"Come on Ivy, you have to come" My mom begs through the phone.

"He didn't even really love me, why do I have to show up to his funeral" I'm annoyed, the man is dead.

"Yes he did Ivy, he was a slime bucket but he did love you" Slime bucket is right.

"He only loved me when I was being like Iris but now he's dead like her" I mumble and then the line goes silent.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to put it like that" Yes I did.

"It's fine, we're all grieving" I'm not.

"I don't get why you're sad, he cheated on you with a white 23-year-old bimbo and he was thirty years older than her" I would have been dancing on his grave and let the woman he cheated with plan it.

"Listen, the whole town is coming because although your father wasn't a good dad he was known to be a great man and people are coming out and I want you to speak" Oh so she wants me to kiss ass and keep the theory going of him being a good man.

I get ready to argue but then I remember that Ingrid saw his dead body and I still don't know how she's doing, I haven't seen her and I do need to be there for her.

"Okay" That's all I can say.

Then I chose to spend that entire night writing out a big speech about how amazing he was.

"Ivy I don't get why you're lying" Sasha speaks up from the backseat.

Kimani, Alex, Sasha, and I are on our way to the funeral which is being held on a big grassy field. I don't get why so many people are coming out for him.

"Because Ingrid lost her dad and I don't want her only memories to be me trashing him at his funeral and I also just want to show up for her but I can't show up without speaking since I am his oldest daughter" It's a lame excuse I know but I need to make sure my baby sister is okay. Even though she's turning 18 and isn't a baby anymore.

Alex isn't saying anything though, he's just driving.

Once we get there we're at a large area buy before the funeral they're of course conversing and eating which is so backwards but I think it's just snacks and not actual dinner.

The funeral starts at 6 pm and it's only 5:30 so that's surprising that so many black people are here early.

I've seen like thirty casseroles in the kitchen of this place and it's probably from the white women.

I'm just walking around the place trying to see who's here but instead, I'm handed a glass of wine by a server.

This is fancy, who paid for this because I know it wasn't my mom?