Journey- A Chicago Med Fanifc Sequel!

Chapter 33

I stare at Ava in disbelief. I don't know what to say to her. Part of me wants to retaliate, snapping back at her, but the other part of me knows that she's right.

I wanted him to kiss me, but he had a girlfriend. I made it happen. This is my fault, and Ava knows it too. 

"I'm sorry," I say finally, because that's all I can manage to say. "I'm really sorry. You're right. It's my fault." 

"I know it is," she tells me, bitterly. "What kind of a person are you? We were dating, perfectly happy, until you came along. You just had to ruin it all, didn't you?" 

"I did, and I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking it through completely," I tell her. I know that isn't an excuse, but I don't know what else to say. 

"No, you weren't," Ava hisses. "That's what you do. You brush through life like you're the main character of a movie. You don't care who else you hurt in the process, as long as you're happy. It's like nobody else matters as long as you're doing well." 

I feel my cheeks redden in embarrassment. She's right. I really hurt Ava, and did she really deserve all of that?

No. No, she didn't. She might be selfish, vindictive and almost my rival, but did she deserve that? 

"I'm sorry," I say again. All I can do is apologise. I want her to see that I'm serious about this. "Ava, I really am. I wish I could say something, or do something, but I can't. I love him." 

"And he loves you, I know, I know, I get it," she says sarcastically. "But you know what? He didn't love you before. He loved me. You broke his heart and left him for a job. And who was there to step in? Me. Because I would never leave him." 

"What I did was a mistake," I sigh. "I regret it. Connor knows that. I realise that I broke his heart, and I'm happy that you were able to step in, but this was a two-person decision. Connor kissed me too. It wasn't just me seducing him. I'm not the villain here. It isn't as black and white as you think it is."

"That's what I knew you would say," Ava sighs, rolling her eyes. "Anything to make sure the blame isn't on you, right? Blame anyone else, even Connor." 

"It's not like that," I insist, although I sense that I'm getting desperate now. "It really isn't. Ava, you shouldn't just be mad at me." 

"I think it's too late for that," she hisses, narrowing her eyes. "Because you just couldn't resist, could you? You couldn't just let him be happy with me?No, because you're selfish." 

"No..." I begin, although I don't know what else to say. She's right. I really wasn't thinking about anyone else other than myself. 

I guess that's what I do, isn't it? I only think about myself. 

Ava's right, and I hate that.