𝙎𝙖𝙣𝙨 𝘼𝙐 𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙩𝙨!! ⋆｡°✩ //request closed// finished

Words hidden behind venom. || Nm x reader

"I despise you."

I stood and listened, watching him spout every word as if it were venom.

"What was it you were on about again? Oh, yes! 'Saving me?'. Well we can see how well that succeeded, hm?"

Indeed.

"I turned into a monster. An ugly ugly wretched thing."

I'd complain and tell you that your beauty is beyond comparison, that I love every bit of your so-called ugly wretched self,

but you're too far gone to hear me.

Deafened by all that pile of negativity to know—or even acknowledge— the truth.

Truly saddening.

"I hate you. You're hideous on the inside, rotten to the core. I hate when you try to care. Hate when you laugh, smile or even look at me with those... hideous eyes..-"

Perhaps the venom I mentioned earlier wasn't just meant in a metaphorical sense.

It's exactly what it was.

Intoxicating. Poisonous.

Something capable of rendering you vulnerable and utterly defenceless.

Something that crumbles away and reveals you to the morning sun all too suddenly.

You feel exposed, don't you?

Weakened, dare I say.

"-..It's all just a ruse. But what do you gain out of it? Why? Pity? For a good laugh? Or maybe you're just a twisted sadistic little bitch... Pfft, who am I to talk, though?"

Still, I remain silent. The answer being all too clear, and as much as I want to intervene, nothing would change.

Perhaps it'd get even worse.

God, I want to embrace you and make you feel safe.

Despite what you think, I won't be disgusted.

And I know you won't hate it.

You never really do.

"Stop. Just fucking stop. You're hurting me and I've changed. That's what I thought, at least. But you're just such a fucking bastard... Such a piece of scum that you make me feel like the very same fragile little boy all those centuries ago. And all of a sudden, I feel no different than who I was. I really do hate you."

That boy is who I love.

And he will live inside you whether I'm there to reveal it or not.

It's him that I want.

Not this fake barricade of brick walls prisoning that loving man.

However, you're just so incredible that you've made me feel adoration for even the most defensive and stubborn sides of you. Even the most wicked of parts are treated like refined delicacies.

Love can reduce one to such bounds.

"I despise your soft look, your subtle gestures, the way you move, the way you talk, the way you sway, breath, stand, gaze, flush, smile, cry, hug, kiss. You're obnoxious. Everything about you is that way."

Then tell me,

Why are you edging closer?

Your intent is obvious, but you still refuse to accept and it's painful to watch.

And as if it hadn't been repeated oh-so-many times, you said those treacherous words a single last time;
"I hate you."

But please tell me,

If that's really meant to be true,

If all of these words were to be reality,

Why has your mouth suddenly clashed onto mine?

Why do you currently hold onto me as if you're too scared to let go?

Why would you involve so much passion?

Once it broke apart, this time, I spoke.

"I love you too."

I smiled,

as if this whole time hadn't just been filled with you slandering me.

As if, instead, you had told me how much you adored me, how much you loved every single aspect of myself.

Because I know, and I'm sure you do too, that deep inside those are the series of words left unspoken.

And yet heard so loud you would believe it was blasted full-volume on speakers.

——————————————
HELP I LOVE THIS
ITS FANON AND CRINGY BUT

I STILL LIKE IT OK

pls I wish somebody would talk to me like this

Like literally say they hate me then straight up make out w me