10. Lonely road

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"Yoongi told me Namjoon was coughing up blood last night" comments Taehyung kicking snow as they walk. The falling snowfall is graceful and weak. Jin hopes it doesn't turn into a storm at some point today. He'll have to walk an awful lot today, "but according to Hoseok, it didn't happen today already."

"I really don't know what could have happened," Jin exhales, exhausted and somewhat dizzy from the subject. "I don't know if you'll pay much attention to me, since it seems to be what they avoid doing the most these days" grumbles the elder and Taehyung smiles square, it's better to take it with sympathy rather than a scolding. For the sake of the relationship they hold, "I need you to stop Jungkook from doing something foolish. Like going out on his own again. I really... I really need you to make him stay on the train."

They both pause for a moment. Taehyung tilts his head to the side and purses the right corner of his lip.

"It's not that we don't listen to them or get a kick out of pissing them off. It's just... We disagree. Don't take this the wrong way, but you've been a bit unbearable these months" Taehyung says frankly and Jin doesn't think anything of it. "You refuse everything, you're stuck in an adverse idea and although we understand that you want to take care of us... it's a bit stultifying. Because it's not really taking care of us-"

"I want to take care that you don't get lost on the path you travel" Jin clarifies, interrupting him as he thinks it necessary. "I don't want them, in the future, to regret anything. Let them feel tormented or undeserving of a decent life" Taehyung smacks his lips, lowering his gaze. "Helping them stay human is all I can do."

Jin looks on the verge of tears. He knows he can protect them in no other way than to keep their minds grounded. Keep them from straying down the wrong path. So far, the most derailed is Namjoon and Jungkook follows close behind. He hasn't killed anyone alive just for lack of opportunity.

If he had the chance, at the slightest provocation he will attack instead of looking for another alternative.

"How do you intend for us to survive like that?"

"I don't know," admits the major with regret, "even so... even a little bit.... A miserable little bit, a part of you will remain the same. That's what I'm trying to achieve."

Taehyung shakes his head. Hoseok and Jin sound so delusional with their aspirations. It's impossible. There is no way they will survive this world without getting lost. Sure, for the model it is possible to avoid killing people, make it an extreme necessity and only when there is a clear threat involved.

Otherwise, it won't get there.

Jungkook would surely get there.

Namjoon already did.

"Jungkook will listen to you," Taehyung states, deflecting the conversation a bit. "He can't leave Namjoon unprotected like that. He shoots himself in the stomach first" he ironizes and Jin scrunches up his face. He doesn't like that as an example. His abdomen hurts just thinking about it. "And in case he did, I'm sure he'd tell me."

"I really hope so."

~ * * * ~

He exhales in annoyance and exhaustion, sliding a bag through the snow that could easily hold a corpse from how heavy and huge it is. He found next to Jin an oxygen tank. It was the last one left in the half-looted pharmacy. With that they would get rid of Namjoon's breathing problem.

Serum, medicines of different types and some other extras that they considered useful or nice for the children. Sketchbooks, coloring books, colors, markers, paints. What a lot of stuff they didn't take from there. It is Taehyung alone who must carry this dead weight.

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