Homestar Saga

Chapter 59: No Cake For You

"You expect me to believe Captain Galbalan just attacked?" Admiral Dresk asked. The comm link was audio only, but his voice dripped with arrogant suspicion. "I find that hard to believe."

"You find it hard to believe that a pirate running a slave trafficking operation opened fire on law enforcement?" Mims quipped. "I thought you Militia types were supposed to be smart."

"Watch yourself, human," Dresk growled. "Nine of my Enforcers are dead. Somebody's going to pay for it, and it might just be you."

Seven hours had passed since Yvian took the Big Dirty. She'd kept the frigate shooting at Mims for an extra fifteen minutes before ceasing fire and announcing she'd taken the ship. The ship's logs had been altered to show Galbalan was alive and kicking when the frigate killed the Militia fleet.

"Somebody already paid for it," Mims told the Admiral. "Galbalan killed your people. We killed Galbalan. Case closed."

"Gribshit," Dresk replied. "Captain Galbalan wasn't even under arrest. Why would he open fire?"

"I don't know," said Mims, "and he's too dead to tell us."

"It doesn't make any sense," said Dresk.

Yvian knew why the Admiral was skeptical. Captain Galbalan had worked for him. The pirate had kept meticulous records. Yvian now had indisputable proof that the Brilend Militia was not only assisting the slavers, but giving them orders. She'd also learned there was a third pirate group still in operation. Mims had promised they could go kill them later.

"Why wouldn't it?" asked the Captain. "Galbalan had just been caught attacking a passenger transport. He had over a thousand kidnapped civilians stuffed in cryo in his hold. Why wouldn't he panic when the Militia got involved?" After a pause he continued, voice thoughtful. "Unless..."

"Don't even think it," the Militia Admiral warned.

"Unless he knew they were dirty," Mims continued. "Unless he knew they'd keep him safe. That's the only reason it wouldn't make sense." His voice was suddenly cold. "Is that why you find it so hard to believe, Admiral? You think he wouldn't shoot your Enforcers because he worked for them?"

A pause. "That's a serious accusation, human." Admiral Dresk said calmly. "What evidence do you have?"

"No evidence," Mims lied. "But isn't it odd that your officers tried to stop me and not him?"

Dresk grunted. "I'll look into it. I'm impounding the Big Dirty as evidence. Get any people you have off it and shut down the engines."

"No can do, Admiral," said Mims. "There are twelve hundred kidnapped civilians on that thing. I gotta get the Big Dirty to a station so I can let them out."

"Leave them," said the Admiral. "We'll take care of it."

"No can do," said Mims. "Rescuing the civvies is part of my contract."

"Fuck your contract," said Dresk. "Stop that ship right now or I'll have you charged with obstructing an investigation."

"Go ahead," said the Captain. "An obstruction charge for rescuing people? The Magistrate will laugh you out of court."

"They're not people," said Dresk. "They're evidence."

"They're civilians," Mims corrected. "And you don't have the authority to take them."

"I'm the Brilend Militia," Dresk growled. "I have the authority to do whatever the fuck I want. Now give me the Gods-damned ship!"

"You can have it," said Mims. "We'll be at the Grayland Trading Station in two hours. We'll leave it docked."