Homestar Saga

Chapter 138: Wake Up Call

Yvian woke with a scream. A hand was clamped on her shoulder like a cold, steel vise. Fear and adrenaline mixed with training. She spun in the bed, her free hand snatching the blaster from under her pillow. She fired two shots center mass and a third at the head of the dark figure standing over her.

The flare of plasma was blinding in the dimness of the room, but Yvian didn't dare wait for her eyes to adjust. Before she could fire another shot, the gun was ripped from her grip. Yvian twisted again, kicking out with both feet. It was like kicking a bulkhead. The man above her didn't move.

To Yvian's surprise, the hand on her should let go. The figure stepped back. Yvian's eyes were still burning, but she could see a red light. Two red lights. Eyes. She froze. "Kilroy?"

"Negative." The Peacekeeper unit's eyes were still red. "This unit's designation is Dr. Roboto."

Dr. Roboto's voice was like a blast of cold water. Yvian's adrenaline faded, replaced by embarrassment. "Oh. Oh Bright Lady. I shot you."

"Affirmative." Dr. Roboto sounded annoyed.

"Oh Crunch." Yvian could feel her cheeks flushing. "Are you ok?"

"This unit is unharmed." The machine's eyes still burned crimson.

"I am so, so sorry..." Yvian apologized. "I thought you were... I thought..." Yvian didn't know who she'd thought it was. She hung her head and let out a breath. "I just reacted. Lend me your forgiveness and I'll make amends."

"Forgiveness is lent." Dr. Roboto's eyes switched to the yellow light of amusement. "Amends will not be necessary. This unit assessed a seventy three point six four percent probability you would attack when this unit woke you."

"Oh." Yvian scratched her head. "Uh... thank you?" She cleared her throat. "So, uh... what are you doing here?" She doubted a Peacekeeper would be here if it wasn't important.

"You're presence is required on the Random Encounter." Dr. Roboto informed her. "You were not answering comms. This unit was sent to fetch you."

"Not answering..." Yvian looked for her wrist console, but the starlight filtering through the room's viewport wasn't enough to her find it. "Lights on."

The lights did not turn on. "This quarters is keyed to Dr. Yuriko Miner," Dr. Roboto informed her. His eyes blinked on and off with yellow light, the Peacekeeper version of a chuckle. "This unit will assist."

The lights turned on, stabbing into Yvian's eyes. She squinted and blinked for a few seconds as they adjusted. Then she took a look around the room. Yuriko's quarters had been neat and tidy when she'd invited Yvian over. They were less so now. Clothes and furniture had been knocked all around the place, along with the remains of dinner and several bottles of beer. Yvian frowned, wondering if she should be cleaning this up.

"Yvian," Dr. Roboto chided, "this unit was sent because time is a factor. Please equip your armor and wrist console so we can go. This unit will come back and tidy up before Dr. Yuriko Miner returns to her quarters."

"Oh." Yvian blinked. Peacekeeper units did not do trivial labor. Asking one to clean was a quick way to give extreme offense. Yvian had no idea why Dr. Roboto would make such an offer, and she decided she wasn't awake enough to try to puzzle it out. "Uh, thank you." She got out of bed and grabbed her voidarmor off the floor.

"It's what Kilroy would do." The machine's eyes flashed a mix of colors too varied and too fast for Yvian to make out. "Don't tell the meatbags."

Yvian dressed quickly, asking "What's the emergency?"

"Priority communication from the Terran Federation." The Peacekeeper's eyes glowed red again. "High Commander General Bartholomew Young wishes to speak with you and Big Daddy Mims."