Homestar Saga

Chapter 135: Operation BACKLINE

"The enemy has fled before us." Warmaster Sithis was a lean specimen, with black fur and a white mane. Her armor was silver. Her voice was grim. "More humans have died today than we've killed in two wars. Why does it not feel like a victory?"

"Because it wasn't." Warmaster Scathach was missing an arm. His silver helmet obscured his features. "The humans didn't leave out of fear. They simply chose to preserve their forces after destroying most of ours."

"It's worse than that." Captain Mims leaned forward, elbows resting on the table. The human had seen the futility of arguing with the pixens, and set up a holodisplay in the Encounter's kitchen. The beer Lissa had handed him sat nearby, unopened. "You need to evacuate the Emperor and all of your stations."

"Silence, human," Sithis growled. "The Emperor said I must tolerate the pixens. He said nothing of you."

"Shut up and listen," Mims told her. "Those fleets were full of YEET Artillery Barges, and they had all the time in the world to pick their targets. That means you have an unknown number of undetectable half ton slugs traveling at eighty kilometers a second. The closest stations will be hit in minutes, if they haven't been already."

"Stupid human, the stations have already..." Sithis paused. "Scat." She switched off her comm, presumably to start giving orders.

Mims let out a breath. "That woman is not inspiring confidence."

"Do not judge her too harshly, Scargiver." Warmaster Scathach shook his head. "We lost Warmaster Lothis when the Vore destroyed Histel, and our most experienced officers with him. Sithis took the position of Second Warmaster only a month past."

"What's her Mafdet?" Yvian asked.

"Fifth."

"Fifth!?" Scarrend chuffed in disbelief.

"After Histel, there are only five of us left who've passed the Sixth Mafdet," Scathach told him. "We must make do with what we have."

"Only five..." Lissa frowned.

"You don't understand how difficult it is to reach the Sixth," Scathach explained. "There have never been more than a dozen of us at any one time."

"I think I might have an idea." Yvian cast a glance at Scarrend.

Scarrend glared back. "What?"

Warmaster Sithis reappeared in the holodisplay. "They're moving," she reported. "The Emperor is relocating as well."

"Moving?" Mims glanced between the two of them. "Your stations are mobile?"

"This isn't the first time we've fought the humans," Scathach reminded him.

"Fair enough." Mims half reached for his beer, then stopped himself. "I guess that's one less thing to worry about."

"Didn't I tell you to be silent?" Sithis glared at Mims.

"You did," said the Captain. "I ignored you."

"You will come to regret that, softpaw." The Vrrl growled.

Mims met her glare with cold detachment. "Try me."

"The human is a Head of State," Kilroy added. "To disrespect Big Daddy Mims is to disrespect the Pixen Technocracy."

"His position is irrelevant," Scathach told the machine. "In the Empire, strength, abilities, and Mafdet are all that matter." He turned to Sithis. "That human is no softpaw."

"He's a-" she started.

"He's the Kinslayer of Aldara," the Third Warmaster cut her off. "He's killed more humans than the entire Vrrl Starfang Empire. He has slain more enemies in combat than your entire command. Scargiver Mims is the single most lethal creature I've ever seen. He is of the Apex, and you will treat him with respect."