How to Survive South Park

Demonic Spells for Dummies

"ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!? FIRST KENNY AND NOW YOU? I GET THAT I'M NOT THE BEST AT THIS BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU TRY TO MURDER ME TO GET A POINT ACROSS!"

I'm currently tearing Timmy a new one as that crippled asshole nearly killed me with his damn 'Danger Deck'. I CAN'T FUCKING RESPAWN LIKE IN THE GAME, ASSHOLE!

(("How do you know? You never died before.")) OH, DON'T YOU FUCKING EVEN-

Deep breaths, Dovah. Deep breaths.

Right now, I'm angry enough to inadvertently start summoning purple flames around me. A new lack of control might also be responsible for that.

As for the sudden color change, after I was nearly beaten to death and gave myself a pep talk, I managed to get a grip on the demonic energy burning my insides for the last few months and combined it with my Netherborn powers.

Come to think of it... those flames looked almost identical to the ones I saw briefly in some of those visions back during the final Stick of Truth fight. Did they actually show me as I am now or is it just a coincidence?

The New Kid's spacetime warping powers were shown doing multiple insane feats during TFBW from moving time forward by over a week to straight up traveling to different timelines and he's only taken some of the "medicine" his parents gave him. Just how powerful can the New Kid become? Reality warper level? Above that?

Back to me, I pretty much only saw red and blacked out after my speech so I had to watch the video clip taken of the fight to get an idea what I did and holy shit was I brutal.

I basically burned MBP's face off while turning the copies of me and Kenny into yoyos and completely disintegrated Butters and his mech. Good thing they were just copies. Also, I finally tested out a new Burning Cloud attack combo that I've been theorizing for a while and it worked amazingly.

While I'm glad that the burning in my chest finally went away, the lack of control is a pretty big issue. Kenny's trying to help as much as he can but this is new territory for him like it is for me so he's clueless on what to do.

"Nothing like this has ever been shown in canon. The show never really focused on superpowers that popped up excluding your immortality but even so... this is just weird."

"Welcome to South Park, been here long?" Kenny asks sarcastically. "I mean, Jesus has a public access television show, aliens stop by regularly to anal probe people, there's an Eldritch abomination living under the police station, and we literally have superpowers."

"Superpowers you guys never bothered training until I got your asses in gear." I point out.

"Well most of the people here with powers couldn't care less about being superheroes or villains 99% of the time. Also, not every Coon and Friend and Freedom Pal has their powers here. Stan isn't Magneto with power tools, Tweek isn't an elemental, Kyle isn't an alien kite-"

"But he does have psychic powers."

(("Dovah is correct but even if we were to get him to train them, his mother watches him like a hawk and would freak out when, not if, she catches him in the act."))

"True that, she makes the ads look like amateurs when it comes to stalking her kids." Kenny adds.

"Look, the point is that like it or not, we can't rely on sheer dumb luck to get us out of these issues. This isn't fantasy, this isn't a show that will always have a solution to every plot line no matter how little it makes sense."

"It was before you came along." Kenny mumbles. I glare at the blond who sticks his hands in front of him right after.

"Relax, I'm kidding. I'm fucking thrilled you got isekaid here and I would choose this world over a 'canon' one in a heartbeat. You're right, the ad arc here didn't start out anything like it did in our show and I doubt it will end the same way either. We'll keep training so we can kill Leslie and the other ads once we get enough evidence. Right now, I suggest giving the town's satanists a visit. They should be able to help you out."