Recovery

16. Spoken Truth

There's a few minutes of silence that to Izuku feels like years as he stares up at the blonde waiting with a trembling core that he can't seem to calm. He knows whatever it is that Katsuki has to say is obviously important.

The blonde takes a deep breath taking a couple pacing steps while he trys to finally gather the last bit of courage he needs to say things he's kept pushed down for years. In all honestly he isn't even sure how to start this conversation, he's never been good with feelings or how to get them across properly, that's one of the reasons he hasn't said anything in the first place.

A soft but curious voice breaks his thoughts.

" Kacchan?"

Crimson eyes glance to see that Izuku has pushed himself into a sitting position leaning back on the headboard.

The green eyed hero gives him a tired smile but one that no matter what the circumstance he's always given the blonde even in the times he didn't deserve to see it.

That soft voice speaks again.

" It's ok Kacchan..you.. you can tell me whatever it is."

Katsuki breathes out heavy running a hand through blonde spikes as he chuckles slightly finally taking a seat on the bed.

" You've always been so damn sweet and supportive. Even when it isn't deserved."

Izuku smiles sheepish.

" That's just me I guess. I think you always hated it though."

Katsuki takes a breath, his eyes not meeting the green ones on him.

" I didn't. I acted that way because it made me feel guilty because of how I treated you. I was trash to you but it never mattered to you, you still were always so fucking sweet and supportive no matter what. I hated how that made me feel because I knew I didn't deserve it, but I never hated it about you Deku."

Izuku is slightly glassy eyed already at this rare side of the blonde he's known forever.

" Kacchan I.. I never wanted you to feel guilty. I'm sorry I made you feel like that."

Katsuki chuckles slightly looking at the greenett in disbelief.

" See.. there you go apologizing for making me feel bad when I don't deserve it. Izuku I deserved how I felt back then, I was terrible to you."

The greenett nips at his bottom lip as he studies the blonde.

" But, you aren't terrible to me now. You haven't been in a really long time. We, we worked past all that stuff Kacchan. You.. you don't still feel that way do you?"

Crimson eyes shift across the room and focus on a picture of him and the greenett in kindergarten. He shrugs feeling his breathing increase. His emotions are on the rise and he's tense inside, he's not use to feeling this way and if he's not careful he'll be crying more than the crybaby in the bed next to him.

" Sometimes. Some of that stuff is hard for me to forgive myself for."

Izuku feels the sting of tears as he carefully reaches to touch the blonde's arm.

" But I forgave you for it. If I could forgive you for our rough past then you should be able to."

That gentle voice and those green eyes have always been Katsuki's weakness. As he finally meets those eyes he feels much like he always has, like he's drowning. He gives a slight smile.

" I'm working on it Deku."

The greenett smiles but then shifts his eyes downcast.

" Is.. is that the reason you came back? Be...because you feel guilty?"