Loving Madness

15. Recruiting

I'd Do Anything For Love- Meatloaf

After fucking ourselves silly that night, things cooled between us considerably. It was almost as if he was afraid he would tell me the big secret if we got any closer. My face heated every time I looked at him and we had more late-night sessions, but we were stalled. Other than fucking once or twice a week, we didn't speak, outside of our naughty talk, we didn't interact or act as if the other existed.

I continued to go to my sessions with Dr. Sampson. I know she knew the jig was up, but she didn't mention it. I did catch her looking at me, analyzing away when she thought I wasn't looking during our sessions. I appeared to be more zoned out during our sessions, fuzzier. I was in this for the long game, I had all the time in the world to get the information that I needed.

I seemed as though I wasn't paying attention during most of my sessions, and the doctor was correct in those assessments. I wasn't paying attention, I was memorizing every detail of every corner of her office. I make her think I am staring into oblivion during these times, but I quickly find a chink in my plan. She would never leave me alone in her office willingly and I have too many eyes on me to try to break in.

During all this time, Sebastian seemed to be checked out. He hardly came out of his room, I didn't hear his laugh echo through the hallways anymore. How can you be upset at someone for cutting you off, when you were given every opportunity to fess up? I listened to his nightmares all night long, he was very vocal. During the quiet times, I heard him murmur my name in his sleep, which made staying away from him all the harder. It was torture. Hearing him scream and not doing anything. Hearing him say my name with a quiet desperation tore away at me.

My delusions only seemed to get worse without him there to support me. I was determined to do this by myself. To conquer the beast alone. I would do it if it killed me. I was also determined to find out what the big secret was, but I realized I couldn't do that by myself. I needed a distraction, someone to cause a commotion that would require the doctor to leave me alone in her office. There was another resident here, Kurt, who seemed to have a particular disdain for Sebastian and Dr. Sampson. So, I decided to introduce myself to him.

He wasn't bad looking, he was tall, maybe six foot four inches, decently built with surfer waves of blonde hair and icy blue eyes. I sat back and watched his patterns over the next few weeks. The only time I would be able to approach him was at lunch. He always sat by himself and during outside time, he played basketball with the other guys. Lunchtime it was. I didn't know what his history was or why he was here, so I know I needed to be careful with my approach.

I decided the best approach in a place like this was honesty. He seemed to be the type to continuously cause as many problems as possible and I was hoping to use that to my advantage. I walked through the line to grab my tray of gray mush and swept the cafeteria to find where he was sitting. He was in his usual spot in the corner of the cafeteria, watching people around him. I met his eyes with a determined mindset and kept them as I walked toward him. He raised his eyebrows at me as I approached. He seemed relaxed and confident, walking a tightrope into the arrogant territory.

"This seat taken?" I question, keeping my voice steady and my eyes never leaving his face.

"No, not at all, as a matter of fact, I was just leaving." He began to gather his things and I quickly stopped him.

"So, I've noticed you don't care for Dr. Sampson or Sebastian too much. I wonder why that is?" He stops gathering his things and looks at me for a moment as if trying to figure out my motive.

"I don't care for a lot of people. Since you've been paying so much attention, you might have noticed." Definitely arrogant. I've dealt with plenty of his type and know just how to play them, so I do. All you have to do is question their abilities.

"Well, I thought you might be up to finding some dirt on them, but I guess I'll have to find someone else," I say, looking at him evenly. I begin to gather my things, but he stops me.

"Why do you want dirt on them?" He questions, still suspicious.

"I asked you a question first."

"I honestly have no clue, something just doesn't sit right with me. You used to fall into that category, but now I don't know where you stand." He studies me some more trying to unravel my carefully placed mask but failing entirely. So, I wasn't the only one who had noticed. Their behavior was off and more than just myself wanted to know why. He raised an eyebrow at me in a way that made my gut clench and I knew he had heard the things going on in the middle of the night.

"I want dirt on them because I've noticed some rather odd things, inconsistencies in stories, behaviors that don't make sense and I gave them the opportunity to tell me. They chose not to, so it's a no-go for me." I make sure to keep good eye contact with him, so he feels I'm being honest with him. For now, I am, but I don't know when the time will come that I can't be honest with him. "I cut contact with Sebastian entirely, but I still go to my sessions with the doc every week. I want to see Sebastian's file. The doctor would never leave me alone in her office without a true emergency happening." He raises his eyebrows as if impressed with my prowess, but I know he also knows that I haven't completely cut contact with him.

"What do I get out of this for helping you?" He asks with a cocky grin. He thinks he has me in a corner, but I don't think he does. I don't think he realizes how far I'll go to get the answers that I seek. I feel his eyes rake along my body and squirm a bit.

"What do you want out of it? There isn't much I can get you, in here." He knows I'm making a good point and thinks about it for a few seconds longer.

"I tell you what, I want an IOU. Whenever I need something or want something, you will owe me." Its an easy request, but I don't know him that well. His IOU could literally be anything, but I was desperate.

"Deal." I figured I would regret this later, but I didn't care. I wanted answers and I was going to get them.

"So if you're coming to me for help, I presume you already have a plan?" He asks. I'm surprised by his intellect. Maybe I need to pay attention better because there were other people here who could pass as functioning.

"I do. I need you to start a fight with Sebastian. Whatever it takes, get him to participate in the fight and keep it going. I have a session with Dr. Sampson right after lunch tomorrow. Wait fifteen minutes after I leave with her and do it then. She will have no choice but to come. Leaving me in her office to look for Sebastian's file." His face is impressed. I don't understand why everyone underestimates my cunning. It could be my unimpressive stature, or it could just be because of his own cocky mindset.

"You may not have long. How do you know if you'll find it in time?" He questions, thinking he had poked a hole in my plan.

"During my sessions with the doctor, I've been a bit restless lately. I've been pacing around her office and I have examined every square inch of it. There are only two places it could be, either her computer, which I am willing to bet she won't think to lock if her precious Sebastian is in trouble or the filing cabinet. From what I've seen, there isn't much in the cabinet. So the computer is the target."