A C C I S M U S| 18+ (haitus)

ACCISMUS- CHAPTER 14~ HIGH

It wasn't the usual, but Dwhyte did it for the thrill. He pulled out his late dad's brown worn-out glasses case from the glove compartment and inside held a rolled blunt. The crisp match box right beside, completely untouched, the lad grabbed a single match stick, the weed lit successfully the first strike. He puffed and exhale, not keeping the smoke in his mouth too long. He hadn't done this in a while and normally the sensations were on immediate effect.

The smell of the weed acted like an herbal perfume, strong and mostly intoxicating. He could already feel the headache coming on. Smoking wasn't his thing, but it sure knew how to banish him for reality even it was just for a second. If a smoke detector was installed, he knew for sure it would've already gone off like crazy. It was like the internal alarm clock in his head was strict to remind him that he has had enough. Four solid puffs were enough to make it eyes water, the taste of burnt grass in his mouth only made his mouth bitter.

"Ganja burns." He laughed, the nostalgia. Someone said that before and now he could only grin like a fool. A random thing to say, but very true.

He pulled at the rear view mirror and adjusted it to can only see himself.

"You are one unlucky motherfucker." He internally cringed. This free spirited self-cursed too much. This side of him don't give a rat ass and he had to question if the weed altered his personality or did the exact opposite. He stared at himself, eyes slightly red, lips dry from the heat.

"Child! You better get your shit together." With his father dying at such young age, he had to learn responsibilities. He couldn't run around and be reckless like other kids his age. His mother was a guide and a lesson teacher. "You better fix that attitude." He pointed at himself in the mirror. The lecture was needed. He scolded his reflection that did nothing but seemed almost defensive and unfazed.

And all in all, even when he was high, he knew that whichever side of the mirror he stood, it was a mere reflection of his true self. The altered ego, the inner child, or just his adult that he was today, older, mature and liable. He was his owns self and he wasn't going to let anything destroy that.

"You've got your fucking high. Talking to yourself and shit." He laughed again, the weed thick on him like a second skin. "Get your ass home, because you're already a danger to yourself."

He turned on the vehicle, engine rattled to life. What was left of the blunt floated in the water cup. He stopped by the fast food joint, not in the mood to be about the house knowing Mike was there. All he wanted was get some food and head straight to his room where he can chow it down because he had worked up an appetite.

The drive-through was empty that evening, maybe because it wasn't on the weekend it was like this and he wasn't complaining. With one car inform and soon him, he drive up to the window and waited.

"Hello. Welcome to Gregg's. May I take your odder?"

"Um, yeah. Can I have a large spicy chicken sandwich extra cheese. Two bread sticks, wings combo and a large limeade."

"Okay sir. That's it?"

"Yea."

"Your total is twenty five dollars and sixteen cents." He passed the cash and told her to keep the change.

"Thank you sir. You may approach the window for pick up."

He collected his food and left. His stomach grumbled, slightly uncomfortable for neglecting his diet. Worst he was going to eat something unhealthy and in a large proportion. When he reached home, the front lights of the veranda was already on, signaling dark. He could clearly see the light in the living room off, all he could think was that the other man must be at bed or out. His shoulders sagged, but he briskly made his way out the vehicle, food in his arm as he used the other to search his pockets for his keys.

"I came to see you."

He was startled. Yev, his wife's side-piece was sitting on the step. He was wearing a black fitted sportswear no wonder he didn't see him as the outfit camouflaged with the night. Dwhyte looked behind himself, wondering if he was really talking to him or was the woman he was avoiding like a plague happened to stand unexpectedly behind him. And she wasn't, Yev stared at him expectantly as if he anticipated him to obey his wishes.

Dwhyte walked right passed him. He didn't owe this guy anything. Who did he think he was? Not having the energy or time of day for the side-piece' or was the sidepiece in his own relationship? What every way around, he wasn't about to entertain his antics. And as he reached the top of the step, he held the foot of his slacks, eyes wore an expression of hurt and betrayal.

"What? What do you want Yev?" He stared him dead in the eyes.

"If you think I'm going to apologize then you're wrong."

He had perfectly shaped brows, oval shaped face and a cheek bone. Hated to admit but he could pass as his younger brother.

"I just want to get it off my chest. I went home so dejected and hurt." He reckoned.

"What for?'

"Listen, I didn't know. I met this wonderful woman online and she had made me feel so loved in just a matter of weeks. I grew so close to her that I waited every second of the day to get a call, even just a simple text from him. No one had ever made me feel so good about myself in a long time."

Dwhyte breath hitched again. Just like the time it happened in his office few days ago. Reality had been so cruel lately, it was like it was cutting his breath off. It was like he was being strangled for his light force. He sat down, the unconscious weak in the knees. It was heart-breaking to know his husband was entertaining someone else during the time of Dwhyte's neglect. He sat down on the step too, wanting nothing but answers.

Diana's out here doing the most for others meanwhile he was constantly questioning and seeking so much of just a small time. She was out here doing her thing while her guilt tripped him for making her pregnancy hard. For not being much present, for the lack of attention for everything that she could think of. He had been so much in thought, he felt Yev's hand on his leg, just a simple touch as a reminder for him that it was all real. It wasn't a dream that he could wake up from then laugh about.

"I didn't know he was married. I didn't know anything. And I feel so guilty for not asking, yet stupid at the same time. It didn't occur to me as I assumed that he was single and trying to find love on the site just as I was. I'm so sorry I met you at an unfortunate occurrence and I can feel you're hurt. You haven't disrespected me. What I heard the other night, you guys need either closure or resolution. But until then, I'm out."

Dwhyte's neck turned. He stared into her brown eyes, unsure of the truth. Was he really? Somehow, deep down that really wasn't what he wanted. It was pretty rare for someone to say such things as he had said and it made him question the other man's authenticity. But then again, he wasn't about to negotiate with the woman when he knew that it was Drian's in the wrong.

"No, it's okay." He averted his eyes this time. The rose bush was what he could see as he stared out at his neighbor's house. He could sense their eyes on him. "We're getting a divorce either way. If you like her, go for it. Just hope and trust that what he did to me won't happen to you. And it's not a taunt."

He pulled out the burger and took a bite, he passed him the brown paper bag. Yev hesitated. That was such a rare gesture.

He accepted the offer and couldn't risk disrespecting him anymore. Such an unpredictable yet kind person. He was willing to still share his food with him. They ate soundly, he picked at the breadstick. His gaze switched to him a few times, she couldn't help but notice that he was completely different from her. Dwhyte seemed more mature and kind. Drian was unpredictable, reckless too. Such opposites, it was hard envisioning them together.

Yev ate and laughed.

Dwhyte glared at him.