Our fallen souls [EN] (High Enough) : VOLUME 1

42 - Joséphine

The minutes tick by quickly, and the party atmosphere begins to take off. An hour into the evening, Shawn and Jared join us, bringing extra energy to the celebration. Shawn gives me a quick kiss on the cheek, making me jump slightly with his warmth. As for Jared, he gives me a friendly smile from afar before heading for the bar. As I watch them, something about Jared awakens a sense of familiarity in me, but I can't quite put a name to it. Every time our eyes meet, he's friendly and smiles at me, even though we've never really exchanged words before.

*

I pour myself yet another glass of Champagne, letting the alcohol invade my veins, eager to let my thoughts evaporate in the euphoria of the evening. Drunkenness sweeps me onto the dance floor, holding my flute in one hand and letting the music carry me away. Cassie joins me, our bodies pressed together in a frenzied dance. Strobe lights illuminate the dance floor, amplifying the intensity of my intoxication, creating an electrifying atmosphere. I lose myself in one glass after another and the frenetic movements with Cassie. After a while, panting and exhausted, I decide to sit down to catch my breath. My restless mind urges me to get some fresh air and light a cigarette. The night is cold, and a shiver runs through my body. Someone approaches and places a jacket on my shoulders. I turn around, dreading meeting Blake's gaze, but instead find myself face to face with Jared.

Why would I expect Blake to miraculously come and take care of me?

"Thank you," I say, lighting my cigarette. "What a nice display of kindness on your part."

He smiles and leans against the door frame. "Can I borrow one?" he asks, pointing to my pack.

I hand him one, and he nods his thanks.

"I've been watching you dance for a while now, and I've got to say, you really suck," he comments mockingly.

Does he want to play that game?

"Just kidding," he murmurs.

I stare at him, lost in thought, unable to think clearly under the influence of alcohol. "Are you trying to hit on me?" I ask him openly.

He nearly chokes on his cigarette smoke. "Are you crazy? Not in a million years."

A muffled laugh escapes me as I stare at the horizon, trying to chase away the tumultuous thoughts invading my mind.

"So... you and Blake?" he asks, swaying from one foot to the other.

"What about me and Blake?"

"Are you two together?"

I widen my eyes, slightly caught off guard by his direct question. "Why do you think that?" I ask, trying to keep my composure.

"Because he seems to care about you," he replies simply.

A nervous laugh escapes me.

I'd rather not get into this conversation with Jared. I need clarity in my head, and discussing Blake isn't going to help me right now. I enter the castle, jostling Jared slightly, signifying my disinterest in the subject. I have no desire to talk about Blake tonight. I just want to get away from this complicated relationship, these swirling emotions. I'm sure Jared has come to try to play Blake's part for him, but alcohol, once again, doesn't make it any easier to manage my emotions.

I head for the bar, avoiding my friends. I pour myself a cup and drink half of it in one gulp. Cassie looks at me worriedly, but Joey beats her to it by coming over to me.

"Is everything okay?"

The music is loud, and I can only hear part of what he's saying, but I understand his question. I nod in the affirmative and return to a chair near the dance floor. A softer melody slowly pervades the atmosphere of the room, replacing the frantic rhythm that reigned before. The soothing pulses of the music echo in my ears.

My gaze wanders across the crowd, searching for my friends. Cassie and Clyde indulge in a languorous slow dance, blending into the movements of the dance. I watch them, envying their natural connection and their ability to abandon themselves to each other on the dance floor. However, my thoughts quickly turn away from Cassie and Clyde when I realize that Shawn and Jared have mysteriously disappeared. Just as my eyes begin to fill with concern, a hand slips into mine. I'm surprised, my eyes widening as they meet Joey's.

"Come on, dance with me, princess."

I hate it, and he knows it. Slow dances and all that ambiance are clearly not for me, but for some reason, I let myself get dragged onto the dance floor.

Joey puts one hand on my hip and the other in mine. I hold his shoulder and hand tightly as I stare at him.

"You know I hate this," I tell him without looking away.

"I know you do."

I rest my head on his shoulder and let the music carry me along. The rhythm picks up slightly, and Joe spins me around before pulling me back into his arms. We stare into each other's eyes as if magnetized. My smile gradually fades as I see his face approach mine. Our lips brush and finally meet. Kissing my best friend is something I thought inconceivable just a few minutes ago. Suddenly, I pull back abruptly, just as the music stops.

"Why did you do that? Seriously?" I ask, pushing him away.

"I..." he begins, looking over my shoulder.

"You what?" I jerk back, my heart racing, and my eyes widen in horror as I realize Blake's presence in the doorway. His face is decomposed, a blood-curdling expression of pain and anger. Time seems to stand still for an instant, seconds stretching indefinitely. I remain motionless, unable to look away from him, captivated by the intensity of his gaze fixed on me. A shiver of anguish runs down my spine as he slowly backs away, step after step, leaving the room with palpable rage. His departure is accompanied by a heavy silence, interrupted only by the panicked pounding of my heart in my ears. I'm about to move forward when Joey grabs my arm, stopping me dead in my tracks. I jerk away from his grip and stare him straight in the eye, anger, and sadness mingling on my face.

"You've ruined everything, Joey. I never want to see you again. Nothing will ever be the same again..." My words seem to touch him, but I don't dwell on his reaction. I hurry back, tears in my eyes, before starting to run towards the exit. Cassie's calls are lost in the sound of my footsteps, and I ignore them, determined to leave this place. I forget the cold biting my skin, my head still foggy from the alcohol. Episodes race through my tormented mind, desperate to understand what had possessed Joey to kiss me.

I run toward Blake, my bare feet pounding the ground, having abandoned my heels a while ago. When I reach him, I grab his arm with some violence to force him to turn toward me. He stops short, his heavy breathing betraying his pent-up anger, but refuses to look at me.