Virago - Ivar The Boneless

Little Pasts

Iona was like a shell of the woman she once was, Hvitserk wished he could show her things, wished he could remind her of her former self but selfishly he wanted her to stay like this forever. Allowing him to spend more time with her, Iona found herself starting to trust the man who claimed to be a big part of her life. This particular day, three days after their evening meeting, she allowed herself to go to sit in the hall with him, the two of them opposite each other at the end of the table closer to King Olaf's end of the room. 

"This reminds me of something," she spoke as she looked around the room. "I keep seeing little things in my mind, nothing really, no people, just places, just things." Little Bear furrowed her brows as she thought about what she was saying. 

Hvitserk raised his eyebrows, "Like what?" 

She sighed as she tried to think straight, "You will laugh." The blonde turned her head to look at her friend, she hoped he would not think it was stupid. "I see a home, a place with four beds. I think I might have been there, I don't know where it is, but it feels like home." Hvitserk looked at her with a slight smile on his lips as he watched her. "I hear cries, sounds of screams, swords clashing and the smell of blood." She looked past him, her eyes focusing on the wall behind him as she thought of the sounds she'd heard, somehow the things she heard were comforting to her. 

"It's good that you are finally getting some of your memory back."

She looked into Hvitserk's eyes, she tried to see if they were the eyes she'd been seeing all that time. Recently she'd been seeing these intense blue eyes, around her everyone else seemed to have dull eyes compared to the ones she'd been seeing in her mind. Hvitserk did not own these eyes though, his eyes were a green hazel colour, beautiful but never the less, they were not the bright blue. Forcing a smile, Little Bear let out a small sigh, "There is one other thing. I just can't get it out of my mind." 

Hvitserk raised his eyebrows, "What is it?"

"Eyes, bright blue eyes." She tried to see if he can't his expression but sometimes he was hard to read. "Do you know who it is?" She asked him hopefully, she didn't know who they might belong to, but every little snippet of her past might bring a memory back. 

"I'm sure whoever it is, it will come to you when your mind is ready." He didn't want to push her too much, she was still learning and he was happy to selfishly keep her to himself for now. 

Iona leaned her head on Hvitserk's shoulder, her eyes staring off in the the distance with a blank look on her face. "I wish I could remember more," the blonde's voice was quiet as she tried to force herself to find details regarding her old life. "I wonder if I am meant to stay this way," she spoke more to herself than to him yet he listened trying to remain composed. "Maybe this is the new life I am meant to lead. Maybe we are meant to be here together, just the two of us forever." 

He wished that was true but he doubted it would stay that way. 

"Promise me that whatever happens, we will always have each other." She moved her head up and looked him in the eyes, she stared at him as she awaited his answer. 

"I know that wherever you go I'll be there," he told her as he reach for her hands. He held them as he looked at her, a genuine smile crossing his lips and a look which told her that he wasn't lying. Then his smile faded, gone was the look of happiness as Hvitserk stared at the beautiful woman, his eyes crossing her face as he looked at truly looked at her. "I'm sorry," he mumbled as he dropped her hands. "I'm sorry for everything that I have ever done to hurt you," seeing her this innocent and helpless made him realise that she was just human, she was just a product of the life they lived. "I would do anything you asked me to, I would be wherever you want me to be in a heartbeat. I just need you to know I am sorry for any of my wrongdoings."

Iona looked confused, of course she was confused, she couldn't remember anything. 

"I offered to marry you at one point," he told her a small snippet of their past together. 

"If you like, when I get back we can get married."

She grinned as she heard the words he had once said to her. "Remind me why I didn't take you up on that offer," she laughed. "If we ever..." she hinted at something more than their friendship with a slight smirk as her cheeks flushed a shade of pink. "Because I can't..."

Hvitserk chuckled at her cuteness, "Have we ever shared a bed?" He had a smile on his lips as he asked the question which she was asking. "We have never shared a bed intimately." Hvitserk was honest with her, he reached up and pushed a piece of hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear. "It does not mean I have not thought of it," he told her, "But your heart belongs to another."

She reached for his hand, holding it against her face feeling his touch on her. It felt like it had been so long since someone had touched her, since someone had been close to her in this way. "You are here with me," she reminded him. Hvitserk noticed her eyes were focused on his, it was like the two of them were the only people in the room for a moment. "I don't feel like there is any one else right now."

He pulled his hand away from hers, he wished he was not as honorable as he'd always been but he could not betray the trust of the woman before him. "You will always be in my life, Iona, but we only ever as friends."

Getting to her feet, she looked down at Hvitserk, "I know you are a good person." She reached for his hair, her fingers touching his braids, the sloppy mess under her fingers as she closed her eyes for a moment. She grinned widely as she reopened her eyes, "You, I've braided your hair many times." She played with the light brown locks that she looked down on, "The home with 4 beds, we've been there together doing your hair." Iona stared at the man before her, her hand moving towards his face, making him look up at her. "Come to bed with me, Hvitserk." 

Taking a deep breath, Hvitserk's eyes were wide as he looked into Little Bear's eyes. "Do not ask this of me," his voice was small. 

She took her hand back, "If you change your mind, you know where I am." Turning away from him, she left the hall where everyone else stayed. Leaving, she returned to the home she'd been given at this new place. She didn't know if she hoped Hvitserk would come, she just knew she did not want to be alone.