REMIND HER HER REMINDER

WILD

Don't date you a nigga that doesn't treat you like a damn princess .I took this lightly and it broke me completely.......Stop rescuing,saving and praying for that relationship that's finna take you to a therapist.Let go there's a lot more out here .You deserve a lot more .And may the best man win your heart.

I really don't want to talk about my ex .Let's just close his page by saying he was a perverted broke pussy .That's the worst relationship I been in .It's like I was dating someone from the dark society.He's literally drained me emotionally and physically but not any more .

I remember I used to pray for me and Cuggy to work out and there was this inaudible voices that kept saying ......Let go or you deserve better or he's not the one or you'll get hurt ....
I know you've had such an experience and we choose to ignore it and pray that they change .

Well we just locked out our first reminder .

TOXIC PEOPLE NEVER CHANGE

so anyways me and Ali made up and I went to see him .He picked me up ,took me out ,got me food and drinks .He brought back the spark that I felt it had burnt down and I was burning again with affection and we made love on that night .
Then the second day was more of Netflix and chill .So yeah my babe cooked for me spaghetti and meatballs and y'all it was so delicious.I barely remember a lot on that day other than sex and showering together .
The candle wax ,the bra straps ,nah you can't be reading what we be doing.....Get your shit together freak!!!
Then the third day he made me the most delicious breakfast I had in my whole damn life then made love and off I left.

Other than meeting up w Ali I've met other people.And i can testify that once you let go of that toxic relationship you'll realize people see you as the prize.The chase,the effort ,the attention offered mseee utajionea tu that your standards are ok being that high and that you don't need to lower them for anyone.Though I've met a few people,Not more than three but the one that had me for a minute was this guy .
Pirate .
He came at work with his white friend .Bruv,both of them were just good looking but you know I've got an obsession over black men so yeah Pirate was the one I locked in with( in my imaginations.)
So the second time they came that's when we interacted and I just kept staying away from where they sat cause I didn't want to act like si you know how someone acts when you are close to your crush  those butterflies and everything.Pirate says I was just nervous .Maybe I was ,maybe I wasn't.
So yeah then Pirate was on a call and when I got there to get his order he gave me this rude reply and I was like oh shitt he thinks I'm on him .That's where I cancel off my emotions and turn my ego on top notch .
But eventually he managed to get my number somehow and not from anyone else from me .
Well he says that he asked for my number to prove to me that I'm into him and I should stop bullshitting him.

ARGHHHHHHHHH!!!Delusional .......

I'm yet to meet up with him .Like have a date .Not as girlfriend and boyfriend as strangers who are getting to know each other ...Yeah !And that's where I just get confused and I don't wanna show up cos I know I'll be in a dilemma in no time .
Cos y'all I'm still with Ali and heeeeehheeee
I just realized I've broken up with Ali more than the months we've dated .We've dated for a month and we've broken up like five times kimchezomchezo.
I feel like I'm taking a toxic journey the only thing I'm scared of is that I end up praying that he's going to love me better or treat me better cause I'll be hurting too much that I can't speak of it and I get the same damn response of letting go and I ignore it and I end up going to a psychiatrist again .

The last break up that we made up has been aight.He's been acting right and yeah that's alright.At the moment I'm filled with fear and anxiety cos I'm about to take a pregnancy test cos I didn't get my period on the last month of the year .like msee it's December ,a festive season and I'm here worried if I'm paged or something .I feel like crying !!!

I get my periods all the damn months then on the last month it trips .
Shit it's crazy .shit is driving me crazy!!!!
I'm from buying the kit ,I've tried peeing on some party cup in my crib to test but I'm freaked out to a point that aint nothing thats coming out .
I don't even think I have the energy to read the results tonight.
I might sleep and read it tomorrow ,maybe call Ali see if hes going to read it for me on FaceTime.
I'm scared as hell .
Though at the same time I know me and Ali finna have cute kids we if happen to last till marriage.
That's foshoo !!!!
I don't want to sleep until I've done the test cos I've been overthinking.Weh my tummy has this small pot at the bottom ,my waist beads don't fit me anymore,I'm eating alot ......like after 30 minutes I'm so damn hungry ,im keeping a lowkey glutton whos pregnant.
And if I happen not to be paged then I'll tell you more about Pirate cos he feels like he's going long character in this tale I live or maybe not !
Though at the moment he's not the only potential guy .I'm trying to balance my love with like two other niggas .
Yes its all clear that if Ali trips hed get a quick replacent.Surprised that by the time we used to break up like the three times ,i end up feeling like ion want to link with anyone else and its just better to fix things though not anymore