I Still Need You (A BMTH, BFMV, etc. fanfic)

Follow You

"Hazel..."

Jax's voice was so...broken.

I looked up at him. Tears swam in his eyes, and he looked devastated. But there was something in his expression missing from mine.

Hope.

"Here." Jaxon reached over and pulled some tissues from the counter. He made them wet under the sink and very gently took one of my wrists, wiping away the blood.

"Sorry," he mumbled every time I even remotely flinched.

"No, it's okay. Thank you," I quickly added, feeling myself blush, "F-for everything."

"It's the least I can do." He insisted. There was a short silence before he very timidly asked, "How come you never said anything to me? I could've helped before it got this bad."

He wiped up the last of the blood before offering me a hand up. "C'mon. We need to talk."

Shakily, I let him pull me up and lead me to the couch. We sat down, an awkward distance at first before Jax closed it, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

I felt my face flush immediately, which was stupid. He was my best friend. Nothing more.

"Hazel...this might be a really bad time to say this..." Jax scratched the back of his head, and my heart rate tripled, "But I just wanna say that...are you blushing?"

My hands flew to my face, as though that would make him unsee it, and I groaned, burying my head in my hands.

He laughed. "You don't have to look so horrified. I just wanted to say..." He let out a frustrated breath, "God, this is so awkward."

"Just say it." I whispered, squeezing my eyes shut and preparing my heart for inevitable shattering.

He sighed. "Okay." He reached forwards suddenly and grabbed both of my hands, catching me off guard. "Hazel, I've...I like you. A lot. And if you were ever gone..." His voice cracked, "I don't even want to know what a mess I'd be. You... you scared me, Hazel. A lot of people still need you. I still need you."

I paused, taking in his words. I felt a cold tear slide down my cheek.

"Jax..."

"B-but, if you just wanna stay best friends, don't let this ruin that, please, I just thought maybe, but-"

"Jax." I said more confidently this time, before leaning forwards, closing my eyes.

Last thing I saw was his mouth dropping open in surprise. Then his hand was tangled in my hair, and he pulled me close, pressing our lips together.

His kiss was everything I dreamed it would be, and I think he felt the same, because when he pulled away, he was beaming from ear to ear.

"Thank you." He whispered, still gently holding my head so our foreheads touched.

"I should thank you." I replied at equal volume, "You've saved me more times than you know."

His eyes widened. "Well, I'll always be here, okay? Like, seriously." He pulled away so he could look me dead in the eyes. "Hazel, promise me you won't hurt yourself anymore."

"Jax..."

"No. I'm serious." His eyes begged me, "Promise me that if you ever get that urge, you'll call me, text me, scream for me at the top of your lungs, I don't fucking care. I just need to know you're safe."

"Okay." I whispered, tears running down my face, "I promise."

He exhaled in relief. "Good. Are you going to tell your dad about all of this?"

"Well, Uncle Lee has been suspicious for months. And I can't lie to any of them, and especially not Dad. But if you want me to try keep it a secret I can." I said.

Jax pushed his hair out of his eyes. Even the simple gesture made my heart flutter and I almost forgot to listen to what he was actually saying. "I don't really see the point in hiding it. My dad is suspicious too, and I..." I saw his cheeks go pink, "I want to... Hazel Holly Sykes, can I call you mine?"

My mouth snapped shut.

Mine.

Jaxon Tuck wanted me to be his.

"Sorry, too soon?" Jax quickly apologized at me silence, "I just mean-"

"Don't apologize. I've just... wanted to call you mine for almost five years now. And now...I can."

His grin nearly split his face in half, turning playful. "Five years? Try ten."

I laughed. "You didn't know me ten years ago. We were five."

He rolled his eyes. "Fine, eight years then. Good enough?"

"Perfect." I giggled, and he gently cupped the side of my face, letting me stare into those beautiful, hope filled eyes.

"I can't imagine it being anyone but you." He whispered.

"I don't think it could be anyone else." I insisted, "I think I need you, Jax."

"I need you, too. That's why this," His warm fingers gently touched my cuts, "needs to stop. Okay? I'm here. Especially now. I've got you."

"Thank you. " I whispered again.

Jax got up, moving to the bathroom again.

"What are you doing?" I called, staining my neck trying to see him.

His head poked out of the doorway. "Finding protection." At my look of horror, he burst out laughing, "I'm kidding. I'm getting rid of your blade so this won't happen again, and I'm telling your dad to keep them locked up from now on."

"You're gonna talk to Dad about this?" I nervously picked at my nails.

He noticed, and I heard him dump the blades into the trash before quickly walking back over, sitting down beside me. "Look, Hazel, I know it's hard, but he needs to know so we can get through this."

I took a shaky breath. "I know. I..." I trailed off. He cared so deeply about me. If he didn't want me cutting, then fuck it, I wasn't going to. If not for myself, then for him.

"Thank you, Jax." I whispered, "For everything."

"Pleasures mine." He smiled, leaning close enough for our foreheads to touch again. I let my mouth hover over his, and he took the opening, pulling me close again and closing the gap.

This kiss somehow held more emotion, a million words we couldn't say, exchanged in moments. His tongue pressed against my lips, and I let him in, feeling myself flush as he smiled.

Then we froze as a new voice drawled,

"Well, well, well."