Cittaja || Indian Historical Romance

58.

"You seem uneasy. Is everything alright between you and Gurugaru?" Shakra asked as he sat down next to the banks of Taarini next to her. They had returned from Guru's ashrama a while ago. Since they had been back, Mayurakshi had been sitting by the riverside. Shakra had some work when he returned and went to finish it. He only heard from Karma that Mayura seemed upset and had been by the banks since they returned.

"Yes. Everything is fine."

"If anything is wrong, tell me, Mayura. I'll help you out."

"No. Everything is fine."

Shakra could tell that something was off. She seemed upset. Gurudev didn't seem to be angry at her when they were leaving. 'Was it the conversation between them that ruined her mood?'

It was already dark. The moonlight made the waters of Taarini look shiny. A few floating diya were let to flow over the waters.

Karma informed him that Madalasa had gone to make the religious trip with Mahadevi for Shakra. Shakra had made a mental note to thank her.

Shakra didn't really know if he should prod her to explain what was on her mind or give her the space she wanted to process everything that was happening. He just sat there next to her silently. After a few moments of him sitting there silently, Mayurakshi started crying.

"Bangaram, what's wrong??" Shakra began to panic upon seeing her cry. He turned toward her. "Nanna, what happened?" He put his hand over her back.

She didn't answer but just kept crying, holding her face. Shakra attempted to get her to turn to face him, but she refused. "Mayura, what happened? Why are you crying? Did I do something? Did someone say anything to you? I'm sorry..."

She suddenly wrapped her arms around his shoulder, hid her face between his neck and her arms, and continued crying. Shakra felt a weight troubling her chest. It burst out into tears after the conversation with Gurugaru. She didn't want to say what the conversation was about. He stopped asking her and pulled her over his lap. He wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back to comfort her. Everything that seemed to weigh her down was pouring out in tears. She was tired of holding back, acting tough, and being the strong princess who was expected to be unreactive to any adversity.

Just as suddenly as she had begun crying, she pulled away, quickly wiping away her tears. "Sorry. I'm just all over the place. I'm fine..." She tried to be strong again and let her princess training take over again but found it hard to pull the tears back into her eyes.

"Sparrow, look at me." Shakra held her face. "What use is a husband if you can't find a shoulder with him to cry on? If you don't want to tell me what happened, then it is alright. But there is nothing wrong with you crying over my shoulder. I will not consider that to be your weakness and shout it out to everyone that you were crying. You have always been strong. You've worn that mask of being emotionless before everyone. If you can't trust me with the truth of your emotions, then what's the point of having a husband? I'm not a decorative piece, right? A husband is a companion. If you can't get comfort from a companion, what good is he for?"

He opened his arm for her. She held him and broke into tears again. Silently crying, scared of someone hearing her cry, she hid on his shoulders. After a while of crying over his shoulder, Shakra felt her falling asleep. He carefully picked her up in his arms and took her back into their room. Her kajal had spread over her face with her crying. He softly wiped the tears away with his anga vastra. He wiped away the stray marks of Kajal left over her face with a wet cloth.

"Why was she crying?" Karma asked in a whisper. Disha stood next to her.

"I don't know. She didn't say anything. She just kept crying and then fell asleep, crying on my shoulder. She didn't seem to want to tell me what made her cry." Shakra closed the door to their room and walked out with Karma and Disha. He informed all the servants not to disturb her at all and let her sleep. "Has she eaten anything?"