Hate That Monsta LXVER (ENGLISH VERSION)

Chapter 26

I walked toward his bed. He motioned me to sit down, which I did after a few seconds of hesitation. A heavy silence reigned as most of the time when we were together. He rubbed his hands on one another the put them back on his lap. I wanted to say something, anything, but I couldn't tell him that I didn't want him to keep his distance, that I thought about him every second of every day.

Finally, he broke the silence.

Jooheon: Can I ask you a question?

I nodded in response.

Jooheon: Did you... did you miss me these past few weeks?

I wasn't expecting this at all. I blinked several times to clear my mind in disarray. I was afraid to answer, but what did I have to lose? Nothing, exactly.

Jooheon: So?

Me (muttering and hiding my face with my hands): Yeah.

He moved my hands apart and put his on my wrists which kindled my whole skin.

Jooheon: Yeah what?

His voice was tense as if he was desperately waiting for my answer.

Me: Yeah, I missed you.

I gulped, expecting the worst.

However, I didn't expect at all his little smile that seemed to illuminate his face.

Jooheon: Really?

I confirmed with a nod which earned me a shy smile. Jooheon, shy? He was probably happy with my confession proving that he had me in his boot. I wanted to ask if he had missed me, but I preferred not to know, in case that his answer would be disappointing.

Me: Well, I should go back to the living room before the guys come to see what happens.

Before even making a single movement, Jooheon hugged me from behind. I jumped in surprise, but didn't untie me from his gesture. I remained there, sitting on his bed, in his arms without moving, afraid that the slightest movement of my hand would stop this moment and the Jooheon he used to be with me would come back. I tried to enjoy to the maximum his heat, his smell and his touch knowing that I might be deprived of it again. Despite this, I kept stressing about the other members who might get here soon. I was supposed to pick my cell, it doesn't take 15 minutes to find it.

Jooheon whispered something in my ear, something I would've never imagined to hear from him.

Jooheon: Don't ever leave me.

I relaxed. Suddenly, with simple words, I became lighter than ever. I didn't want him to tell me why and how. At that moment, the only thing I wanted was to immerse myself in his presence and affection. I didn't care to know where it came from. All I knew was that I felt happy, and that was the important thing.

Unfortunately, after only 5 minutes in his arms, I knew I had to go back with the others. With Jooheon, nothing was ever safe, he had fever, and so I wanted to avoid that the guys imagine some false things. I wanted to avoid making myself false ideas also.

Jooheon lay back down and I gave him a kiss on the forehead before leaving the room.

Arriving in the living room, I saw that it was still the same three guys playing. They were really strong.

Minhyuk: Damn Ha Neul, we thought you were gone in Alaska to find your phone. You had forgotten it very far.

Me: Oh, since Jooheon was sleeping, I took the opportunity to watch him sleep...

I knew they wouldn't suspect anything. After a month, they all knew how much I missed Jooheon and fully understood my act. I myself was surprised that it had been that easy to get out from this. I was a bad liar, but in this case, I did pretty well.

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The next day I went back to the dorm in the afternoon. Jooheon told me to come because the members wouldn't be there. They had to go to an office before going to a fan meeting where he couldn't be present because of his current health status.

When I arrived, Jooheon was sitting on the sofa in pajamas. He told me that the guys had just left for the agency 10 minutes ago and that they would come back later in the evening. It was so weird to see Jooheon talking to me with his normal voice and his usual playfulness, behavior he never had with me. I sat on a chair diagonally with the sofa. Better to start slowly.

Now was the right time for to ask my questions. He was in a good mood, which made me doubt about his discomfort due to the flu. I'm sure he could have gone to the fan meeting. All those fans who would be disappointed not to see him.

Me: Um... why have you changed your mind about me all of a sudden? I thought it would never work...

Jooheon: I... I realized I needed you.

My heart capsized. I couldn't believe he said that.

Jooheon: I'm trying to get away from you but it makes me suffer more.

Me: But why have you wanted to get away from me..?

I think of all the questions I wanted to ask him, it was the one that tickled me the most.

Silence seated. I didn't want to put pressure on him so I was watching the ground waiting for him to say something.

Jooheon: Actually...

Wonho: HA NEUL???

Shit.

Jooheon: What are you doing here?

Wonho: We forgot our cards. And Ha Neul, what is she doing here?

Jooheon gave me a look that begged me to find an excuse.

Me: I wanted to come see you, but you weren't here so I held company to Jooheon but I was about to leave.

Wonho: Oh, we hadn't told you that we wouldn't be here today?

Me: Well, no, you forgot to warn me.

In fact, I.M told me, but hopefully he won't remember. Nah, it's clear that he won't remember, it was I.M after all.

Wonho: Okay, see ya.

He left with the cards in his hands as quickly as he arrived.

I wondered if I wouldn't be better to leave as I said I would do to Wonho. At the same time, I didn't want to leave.

Jooheon: Come here.

His arms outstretched toward me, leading me to get there. Immediately, I got up from the chair. Sitting on his lap, my feet on the seat beside him and supporting my head on his shoulder. My mouth was only a few centimeters from his neck, I placed a kiss and he shuddered. He held me as if he was afraid that I run away, afraid that I abandon him.

I sat up slightly in order to look at him. I planted my eyes into his. The eyes of a person was like an open book on her feelings. I wanted to read Jooheon's feelings, be the person who would know him the best, the person he will love relentlessly.

End of chapter 26! Thanks to follow he fiction and to vote^^

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