Shawn Mendes Imagines

Battle

(Y/N POV)

Another day at the mental ward. Currently sitting in my chair, spinning in circles.

I work here as a psychiatrist for people with mental illnesses. The only reason I work here is because my mom used to stay here. She was a wonderful woman that lost her battle to schizophrenia a couple years back.

She took her own life in her room or whatever you want to call it. She hung herself with her bedsheets.

I guess the voices were stronger than hers.

I have a interesting patient, named Shawn. He has schizophrenia too and tried to commit suicide multiple times.

I got assigned to him a few months back. I was hooked on what was going on in their thoughts.

Mom mom would never show me her true self. Around the family, she was always happy and a go lucky person. But behind closed doors was a different story.

Whenever I tried to talk to her about her illness, she would change to another subject. And if I kept pushing, she would just ignore me.

My father knew the real her though. He stuck with her through whatever came their way because they were deeply in love.

When she passed, I wanted my dad to spill the beans on her. But he said that I would think of her different.

I eventually gave up and stopped talking about her overall. I became a psychiatrist because I didn't want other people to go through what happened to my mom.

He was one of many of my cases. Shawn is different from other people that I treated with schizo. He wasn't severely affected but enough to become isolated. Other people would call him crazy, I call it; trying to find himself.

There's this voice that he always talks about; Josh.

This is the voice that tells him everything. He tells me the other voices don't matter as much as Josh's.

I gave him a diary to write in every so often.

Dear (y/n),

I want to get out of this hell hole.
Josh says that you are trying to take him away from me. You can't do that because he's the only friend I have,

Shawn.

That was one of his entries. He won't take the pills I prescribe to him. But when he has his visits with me. He eats first, or when he does decide to eat. We crush up the pill and sprinkle it on his food.

When he talks to me, he needs to be stable or I can't help him.

One of the nurses open my door breaking my train of thoughts.

"Patient 043 is ready." She says as she brings Shawn into view.

He's in his usual attire, all white outfit that the institute makes him wear.

Shawn gives me a small smile as he comes to sit down.

Shawn is actually the highlight of my day. Talking to him and him telling me what's happening in his head gives me more of an idea to what my mom had to deal with.

His bags under his eyes are there. I frown at the sight, specifically telling him to sleep the day before so those bags could disappear. Clearly he didn't listen.

Leaning on the table with my hand atop if it, "I see you didn't sleep much last night like I told you too." I chide.

The door closes as a bodyguard walks to the corner of the room.

"I couldn't, Josh was talking to me." Shawn shrugs, throwing his diary on my desk and sinking back into his chair.

My ears perk up. Lately Shawn has a little more normal. This is the first I've heard of Josh in a week.

"What did he say to you?" I question getting my notepad ready.

"He told me that it's time." He answers picking at his nails.

"Time for what?" I press.

"I can't tell you that, Josh said not to." Shawn sighs.

"But I'm your friend Shawn. You can tell me anything." I say.

"Sorry, the only friend I have is Josh." Shawn shrugs again.

"Shawn, if you want to get better, you can't keep stuff like this from me." I sigh.

"Don't you want to see your friends and family again." I add on leaning back and taking off my reading glasses.

"Josh says that my family put me here, they don't want me." He declares.

"That's not true, they put you in here so you can get better. They want you out of here so they can see you again." I reply.

"Josh says I have to stop listening to you."

"Don't listen to Josh, Shawn! For once, listen to me. Josh isn't real, he's going to end up leaving you." I exclaim.

"Josh is my friend! The only person that understands me. And you're trying to take him away. You are suppose to be helping me. Not making me worse!" Shawn screams getting up and darting to me.

I let out a scream, but before Shawn can harm me, the bodyguard has him pinned on the ground.

"Josh is my friend! He is!" Shawn screams as the bodyguard pulls him out of my office.

I sigh again, hoping that tomorrow's lesson will be better.

As I come into the office I lay all my stuff in my desk and plopping on the chair. Just 4 more hours until I see Shawn again. As I'm with another patient, Shawn's nurse opens the door and waves her hand signaling me to come outside.

I nod at the bodyguard as I slip through the glass door.

"You called me for?" I question.

"(Y/N), it's about Shawn." She sighs.

"What about him?" I ask folding my arms together.

"He killed himself at night. He left a note for you." She sympathetically says handing me the note and walking off.

Dear (Y/N),

Josh told me to do it,

Shawn

I heavily sigh. Shawn was doing so well. I thought he had a chance of actually making it.

Walking back in, I put the note on my desk and continuing with my current patient.

Another battle lost.

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If I offended anyone, I'm sorry. I was just interested in the illness.
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Love always <3