Shawn Mendes Imagines

Worthless Pt. 2

(Y/N POV)

  I wake up the next morning, eyes puffy and swollen from the events last night.

  Shawn coming over, spilling his heart out. Me being too tired and him not being able to drive back home.

  So I let him stay in the guest room for the night. Even though he hurt me, I still care for him.

He did just tell me not even 10 hours ago that he was in love with me.

  How am I suppose to feel? Euphoric, Overjoyed?

  Things changed in the past 6 months, I've changed as a person.

  I've grown and learned from my mistakes.

  I'm not that dumb naive girl that tore out her heart and soul for a boy who didn't even love her back.

  I'm trying to be strong, I owe it to myself.

  But I can't help but feel the suppressing  urge to run into his room and just lay with him.

He's hurting, so am I, but I can't just forget what happened. It's too soon.

  Being to scared to run into Shawn, I stay in my room for another hour, reading a book I've recently gotten into.

  Pulling my hair through my fingers, I put on my glasses and step out to freshen up.

  Going to the restroom, I keep an eye out for the door leading to the other bedroom where the man I love-loved is sleeping.

  Slipping out of my clothes, I turn on the water and step in, not giving mind to the chills running down my back as the cold beads of water rain on me.

  This is the only place that gives me time to think and process what's going wrong.

  I've spent 6 months building up this wall of protection and I'm one night it's all crumbling down.

  It wasn't suppose to be like this, he wasn't suppose to waltz back into my life and act like everything is ok.

  I swore to myself that I wouldn't cry for me, not anymore but everything, everything was fucked up, right when he walked into my home.

Feeling my fingers getting wrinkled, I get out and put on a new shirt way too big for me. Placing my glasses on the bridge of my nose, I sigh looking at how the glasses cover a bit of the bags, not wanting Shawn to know I cried myself to sleep.

7:02 am the digital clock read.

Opening the door, steam seeps out from the cracks as I walk into the kitchen to prepare myself breakfast.

My breath gets caught in my throat when I see a shirtless Shawn, eating breakfast.

With another steaming plate of eggs bacon and tea right next to him, for me.

Another brick breaking off and falling.

He doesn't even notice I'm standing in front of the kitchen island, his hand rested on the side of his face, holding his head up as he forks up the eggs, putting it in his mouth.

I don't want him to think we're on good terms, so I walk into the kitchen, pretending I didn't see the breakfast he prepared for me.