Chapter 55

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Chapter 55

"Okay, I will check it out right now" I said to my manager when she asked me to check a room to see if the patient was awake. I started walking towards there and was immediately hit with the memory of Kamal. He was once laying here too, in this exact room. I shook my head to try to dust off the thoughts. I wasn't going to think about him, because I knew I would lose it when I did. We hadn't been talking for such a long time now and it hurt me a lot. In a way, it made me feel better too. I was more focusing on school and my work, and of course Karim. I was trying to be positive all the time since I knew I would go all down when I would cry. I was slowly finding myself, since I didn't even know myself before. I didn't have the time and chance to live my last teens. Eighteen, nineteen- these were all the ages where people would find themselves after searching for years. I got Karim when I was nineteen, so I had to grow up too fast. I didn't have the time to think about myself nor did I have the chance to. I had to figure out how I was going to survive and how I was going to bring my child to the world on my own. I had to go through the painful moments of having no family by your side. Having no money. Having no roof to stay under. The days that went by on the streets were the worst, and I would never want to go back there again. Suddenly a ring started to echo through the hall and I grabbed my phone out of my pocket to see who it was. Unknown. I didn't want to answer it so I just shut off my phone, since I knew it would be Nourdin or someone else stupid. As I was in the room, I saw the person laying there on the bed. My eyes widened and I felt a feeling in my throat. This was not what I expected. She looked at me and I knew she was shocked too. I neared to her slowly, wanting nothing more than to close the gap.

"Mama.." I whispered, letting the tears fall from my face. It had been so long since I had seen her. Her leg was wrapped up and the thought of her being hurt was ripping my heart.

"Manar" she said, letting the tears fall too. We were both letting our guards down, needing to end this distance. I neared her, taking her hand in mine. The familiar feeling of her hand gave me these nostalgic feelings that were letting me cry more. The hand that I used to hold every day when I went to school was again in my hands and I couldn't believe it. It was like a dream, seeing her here.

"I missed you" I whispered, sitting down on the bed. She caressed my cheek, making me want to hug her even more. I have missed sleeping next to her and telling her my problems that I was facing as a teen. I missed cooking with her and her getting mad at me for burning so many dishes. I missed me fighting with Maher and mum always getting mad at me and throwing the infamous slipper my way. After a few minutes, she suddenly left my face and I opened my eyes. She looked at me with betrayed eyes that made me anger. She still didn't believe me.

"You ruined us. You don't deserve us" she said with anger. I stood up. I didn't know what to do for them to make me believe.

"Nourdin ruined me. Nourdin ruined us. That day when you told me to bring food to them, he followed me. He did all of this, not I" I spat back. I didn't get the logic. Why didn't they believe their own daughter? She was going to speak but I beat her to it.

"Tell me, why would I lie about this? What could I possibly gain from this? I didn't have a roof above my head. I got pregnant and had a child at such a young age. When I went into labour, I had no one to hold the hand of. I had no family- nothing. So tell me again, why would I  do something like this if I would lose everything instead of gaining?" I told her, trying to let her understand why I wouldn't lie. She shook her head, looking away.

"I am your daughter!" I yelled when I felt like she didn't even see me as one. She looked at me for a second.

"You are not my daughter anymore. I have only one child and that is Maher. Maher would never betray me like this. You ruined us. Your father has heart issues thanks to you. When he walks on the street, people would look away, thanks to you. So don't try to tell me these lies, since we all know who caused it" she said, still not believing me. The generation of our parents always lived in a closed box without a door. They wouldn't think further than their rules allowed them. If he would believe me, these people would shut up with a few words. But they weren't gonna move a finger to do that. Suddenly I was done. I wasn't going to fight it anymore. I turned around and walked towards the door, begging Allah to give me strength. When I opened the door, I turned around and looked her in her eyes.

"And I have only one child and that is Karim. Karim would never betray me like this" I copied the words, closing the door with a loud bang.

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Such a sad chap:(

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