Adopted by 5SOS

Chapter 3. Backstory Revealed

Shiloh's POV
I slowly forced myself down the stairs to see the boys sitting on the couch. "Hey kiddo. Did you decide on what you were hungry for?" Ashton spoke up as he muted the television and they all turned to face me. "Uh... Well, no actually. I'm not hungry..." I quietly said as they shared a glance. "Are you sure?" Calum asked as I nodded and turned on my heels. "Wait! At least sit with us down here, instead of being cooped up in your room the whole time!" Luke called as I stared up at the sky before turning to face them again and walked over to the couch.

"Well boys, what are you in the mood for?" Luke questioned as I sat on the couch in silence. "Can we order Chinese?" Mikey asked as the boys shrugged. I remained on the couch while Ashton went and ordered their dinner. "May I be excused?" I quietly whispered to Luke as he looked at me. He nodded and I felt his eyes watch me as I jogged up the stairs. I needed to get away from the boys stares. They were making me uncomfortable. Thank god the boys had the bathroom stocked fully with what they thought I needed. I found a pack of razors underneath the sink behind the extra toilet paper.

*TRIGGER WARNING*

I picked out the blade from the razor and threw the razor into the garbage can. I sliced one on my left wrist, wherever I found the room. I cleaned up and sighed in relief. There, my salvation had been restored. I changed into my pajamas-short sleeves and pants-and laid in the bed, staring at the ceiling. 'Aren't you happy you didn't eat anything today? You're making your way to your desired weight.' The voice in my head said. "Shut up.." I whispered to her as I still lay flat on my back. There was a knock on my door, causing me to sit up. "Come in!" I softly called as the knob turned and Ashton walked in.

Before he noticed me, I quickly pulled the covers up over my arms. "Shiloh, are you sure you're alright?" He asked as he came and sat next to me in the bed. "Mhm." I nodded, avoiding his eyes. "Shiloh." He grabbed my wrist, and I hissed in pain. He instantly let go and then looked down. He went to reach for the covers as I whimpered and shook my head.

I didn't want them to find out, at least not yet.

"Shiloh... Let me see." He said slowly as I looked away from him with tears in my eyes. I felt the covers disappear from my arms and my arms being lifted to be examined. "Why... Why hurt yourself? You don't have to be ashamed, I used to cut as well." He asked softly, me still avoiding his gaze. He turned my face to look at him as a tear rolled down my cheek. He briefly wiped it away, and awaited me to answer. "It was my fault. It was my fault she died." I whispered as he furrowed his eyebrows. "What are you talking about?" He suddenly questioned, making me look up at him.

Should I tell him? Should I let him in on the guilt that I've carried around for the past eight years?

I sighed in defeat and looked back at Ashton's hazel eyes staring back at me. "So, when I was six years old..." I trailed off and then stopped as tears threatened to spill down my face. "Go ahead at your own pace, I'm right here." Ashton reassured as he grabbed my hand and rubbed it soothingly. "So, when I was six. My parents were constantly fighting and it was clearly stressing out my older sister, Amethyst." I spoke, taking a deep breath.

"So, one day, my parents were screaming at each other and something crashed downstairs. Amethyst shut me in the closet of my bedroom. I heard her go into her room, mumbling about doing something and that it had to be quick." I stopped as a tear rolled down my cheek at the memory. "I sat in my closet when I heard something fall over next door. I ran out and into my sisters room. I had found her and she-she-" I stopped mid-sentence and bursted into tears. Ashton instantly wrapped his arms around me, trying to get me to calm down.

"It's okay, you don't have to finish. You can tell me another time." He consoled as I shook my head. "No. I need, I want to finish." As he sadly nodded and watched me continue to speak. "Anyway.. She had hung herself, and my six year old self screamed at the top of my lungs which halted my parents arguing. They both pounded up the stairs and my mother screamed out about 'her baby'. I began smiling because it was the first time in years that my house wasn't filled with screaming all the time."

"My father then looked over and had asked what I was smiling about. My mother suddenly gasped and pointed a finger- she thought I was smiling because I had made Amethyst kill herself. In reality, it was the stress of my parents fighting that caused it. And so to end it... My parents then blamed me for her death, my father ordering me to pack my things. They drove and dropped me off at the nearest orphanage, and then drove away without another word." I stated as I finally looked up at Ashton.

He even was now crying and he wiped them away fast. He engulfed me in a hug as I began crying again. There was a knock at the door and all three boys stood in the doorway. "Is everything okay in here?" Calum questioned as Ashton looked at me. "Don't tell them.. At least not yet. Please." I whispered as Ashton nodded sadly at me. He tucked me in, making sure my arms were hidden under the covers before the boys came over.

Ashton said I've had to tell the others soon or else he would. He kissed my forehead and stood by the nearest wall, watching the other boys kiss me goodnight. "Goodnight kiddo." Luke spoke sweetly as he bent down and kissed my forehead. "Goodnight Shiloh!" Michael and Calum chorused together as they kissed either side of my face. Ashton walked out behind the others, looking back at me one last time.

"Good night, Shiloh." He said while he walked out and shut the door behind himself.

Ashton's POV

I followed the boys back down to the living and onto the couch. "So, what did she tell you?" Luke spoke up from beside me, while eating Chinese from the box. "She told me her backstory on how she came to be at the orphanage... And there's one other thing." I said aloud, all three boys staring at me. I don't care that I lied to her face, the boys needed to know so we could help in any way. "What is it Ash?" Calum questioned, suddenly worried at my long pause.

"She self-harms. They're all across her wrist, going in different directions... And on both arms." I retorted sadly while staring at the floor. "Well Ash, that's why we're here. We're gonna help her through this." Luke replied while looking at me, smiling.

In all honesty, I hoped he was right.