Chapter 34

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Hanna's POV

I woke up the next morning and got ready for my appointment with Dr. Sullivan.

I arrived at her office at twenty past one and waited outside.  After a while, Dr. Sullivan came out. "Hanna Marin", she called.  I stood up and followed her into her office.

"Hello Hanna, how are you?", she asked.

"Im fine", I replied.

"Hanna, I spoke to Spencer on the phone and she told me that you have been going through a lot lately. Is that true?", Dr. Sullivan asked.

"Well, my fiancé was in a terrible accident, well it wasn't exactly an accident, but he's in a coma and might never wake up" I said holding back tears.

"And your pregnant?", She assumed.

"Yes", I confirmed.

"Are you worried that your baby may be left without his or her father?", Dr. Sullivan asked.

I hesitated before speaking, "You're not allowed to repeat anything we talk about, are you?".

"No.  By law anything said during these sessions have to stay between me and the paitent", she replied.

"Okay, then I'm goin to tell you the truth, but you can't tell anybody", I said quietly.

"Of course.  Go ahead", the doctor replied.

"The baby... she isn't Jordan's.  Jordan is my fiancé but the baby isn't his", I confessed.

"But you see, that's what the problem is.  That's why I'm here.  I've been trying to explain to everyone that Jordan getting hurt is the universe's way of punishing me for my affair.  Nobody believes me, they all think i'm going crazy", I cried.

"Hanna, can I ask you a question about your medical history?", Dr. Sullivan asked.

"Sure", I replied, still crying.

"You suffer from PTSD, right?", she began.

"Yes", I replied.

"And are you still taking your medication", she asked.

"Um, no.  I had to stop taking it when I found out I was pregnant.  Its not good for the baby", I replied.

"Hanna, I understand that you don't want anything to effect the health of your baby, but by not taking your medication you're risking your own health", the doctor explained.

"I can't take them pills.  If Jordan dies this baby is all I'll have left.  I need her to be perfect.  I'd rather risk my own health than hers", I replied.

"Hanna, what good are you to her if your not well.  If it comes down to it and Jordan doesn't pull through and you continue to not take your medication then your baby could end up with nobody.  And without them pills you are extremely vunerable.", doctor Sullivan explained.

"What if I halfed your prescription.  You are currently supposed to be taking two pills a day.  Maybe just take one a day.  That way things will work out okay for you and your baby.  This is what's best for both of you, Hanna", she suggested.

"Fine.  I'll do it', I agreed.

"Good.  I promise this will help you.  Your mind will be in a healthier place and hopefully you will be able to think more clearly about Jordan's accident", the doctor replied.

She wrote me out a perception for my pills before showing me out the door.

"Thank you for your help, Dr. Sullivan", I said as I left.

"No problem Hanna.  Come back in a few weeks for a check up", she replied.

I then got into my car and began to drive to the nearest pharmacy.  When I got there I handed in my prescription and got my pills.  I then drove back to Caleb and Spencer's.

When I got there Caleb was sitting on the couch.  "Hey, how did it go?",  Caleb asked.

"Ehh, it was okay", i replied.

"Did she find out what was wrong?", Caleb asked.

"I stopped taking my pills", I replied.

"She said not taking them made me vunerable", I added.

"Hanna, why did you stop taking them?  You knew the risks of not taking them", Caleb said with hint of anger in his voice.

"Yes, Caleb.  I did but I also knew the risks of taking them and what it could do to my baby", I replied.

"Our baby, Hanna.  She is our baby", Caleb shouted, getting angrier.

"Where's Spencer?", I asked quickly in a panic.

"Don't worry.  She's out.  She went shopping", Caleb replied.

"I understand that you were trying to do what was best for the baby ,Hanna, but I can't believe you didnt even involve me in that decision.  She is my baby and you are her mother and I love both you.  You two are so important to me.  You should have asked me, Hanna.  You should have came to me for advice.  I could have helped you", Caleb said, crying.

"It wasn't anything to do with you.  This baby is mine and Jordan's despite what biology says.  You have your baby with Spencer you don't need us", I replied, also crying.

"Yes. I do.  I love you", Caleb replied.

"We can't do this anymore, Caleb.  Look what it did to Jordan.  He is the one that is suffering for my mistakes", I cried.

"No, Hanna.  I'm not giving up on you.  You'll wake up in the morning after taking your medication and you will see everything clearly again.  You'll realise that what happened to Jordan had nothing to do with me and you", Caleb said, persuasively.

"No, Caleb.  I'm sorry.  But its over.  For good this time", I replied through many tears.

I walked towards the front door and walked out, slamming it shut behind me.  I got into my car and began to drive.  I didn't know where I was going or where I was going to stay.  I just knew I couldn't stay there anymore.

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