foreign thoughts in the studio

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  Yoongi wasn't good with emotions. He blamed this afternoon on that. It hurt his pride less than saying he was too self-conscious to show his lyrics to someone. Yoongi looked down at his hands the constant words of "you fucked up real good this time" repeated in his head multiple times.Yoongi told himself to get closer to taehyung if that was still possible so that he could one day have the courage to show him his lyrics. He looked over to the counter where namjoon was at. The thought of asking him for advice on this whole situation passed through his mind. He threw it away as soon as it had entered, though, feeling that his pride had just been stabbed and it didn't need to be injured more.

He stood from his seat, running a hand through his hair. Maybe a trip to the studio was what he needed. So he left his work place and started walking to it. He was once again reminded that ripped jeans shouldn't be worn during December at all as he exited the place. He didn't bother going bad to his apartment to change, he knew that if he went back he wouldn't want to leave the apartment again. It was cozy like that.

His walk to the studio was filled with everything Christmas. From store windows being wonderfully decorated to the sounds of Christmas songs filling what could have been silence. He didn't hate that, but sometimes he wished he could walk around during this month and finish said walk with out hearing "Jingle bells" or "have a holly jolly Christmas".
When he arrived at the studio nobody was there, which was expected since it was mainly used by yoongi. Not many others came her as often as him. The only person to come close to rivaling him was jimin, since he came here to hear Yoongi's music or being him dinner cause yoongi was occasionally that lazy.

It was nice to have silence as he walked over to the piano, ghosting his finger tips over the keys. Suga didn't touch it very often since he deemed it should be played by someone with an equally beautiful voice to the piano. That voice was something he didn't have. That didn't bother him, he had his skills in rapping instead. He took pride in it. So much pride he was working on a mixtape.

Jimin had laughed followed by "im gonna be the first person to buy it" when Yoongi had told him. It made yoongi a bit hopeful but he still questions why jimin laughed.

He wasn't sure what to do since he had no inspiration to write lyrics for anything. He found himself instead sitting in front of the piano playing random keys, but in a way that it still sounded beautiful. Sometimes playing with the keys got him thinking and gave him a bit to work with, but today he didn't get shit. Every time he got the hang of a
tune, the sad face of taehyung's appeared in his mind, causing him to hit an off key.

He questioned why taehyung took it so personally that he didn't want to show him his lyrics. They had known each other for little over a week. Was taehyung already that attached? He shook his head at this, they had two complete conversations. Yoongi could only dream taehyung was that attached. He didn't though, why would he?

Even if he wanted to daydream about the boy he had nothing to go off of, yoongi wasn't very creative in that area. Yoongi had too much going on in his head to space out and daydream anyways. His head was filled to the brim with lyrics, thoughts of why coffee was horrible, and now taehyung was constantly in the mix as well.

Yoongi found himself constantly wondering about taehyung. He wondered what made him want to go into computer science. He wondered if he like music a lot. He
wondered how he could smile so easily. What he wondered the most is why he made these tugs in his chest appear, and why he cause his heart to quicken in pace. Those last two confused him since he never felt like that before.

Taehyung was causing foreign things to happen in his chest. Foreign thoughts appear in his mind. Most things that were caused by taehyung were foreign to him. These foreign things cause his wonders of the younger boy. It made him want to talk to him more.

He decided he would text jimin when he gets home for advice since jimin couldn't break his pride. Jimin had seen him at his lowest so pride wasn't exactly there anymore.
Yoongi also decided it was best to just go home, he was getting no ideas at all. He stood up from his piano ghosting his fingers over the keys one more time as if to say goodbye. He then turned towards the door and started his walk back home.  

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