Fantasizing

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Present day

My hair flowing in the swift wind, and my small brown feet plunged in the warm, tan sand. The sun shining high in the sky over my body was perfect.

The beach.

I gazed at the sky and was blinded by the sun's intense beam; I grabbed my Louis Vuitton sunglasses from the top of my head and pushed them onto my face. I looked down at my sexy chocolate body and my bikini and couldn't help but stare in awe. I couldn't believe how flawless I was.

The beach water reached my feet and washed all the sand from them exposing my perfectly done pedicure that I had been done earlier today day. I lay back in the sand enjoying this relaxing time what more could I ask for?

Finally I pulled out my expensive flip-flops and a matching cover up to go with it. And put them on slowly. As I began to rise up I heard the faint sound of seagulls flying past my beach house in the distant. I turned my head from left to right loving the fact that I was all alone

"Zeeeeen"

"ZEEEEN!" I quickly flew up from my mattress when hearing my name being called. Even though I was disappointed that my fabulous dream was over I got up and looked at the clock anyway. It read 5:45 AM. It was time to get up if I wanted to get my brother and me to school on time. I lifted myself up from the old beat up mattress letting the covers fall off of me. I headed to the kitchen following the voice calling my name.

To no surprise it was my older sister, Dawn or the only person that could wake up this early and be sane. "Yes Dawn? I'm up" I said in frustration while rubbing my tired eyes. It was no secret that I don't like waking up this early, every weekday. Hell who did?

"Zen, you know you can't be sleeping in if you don't wanna be late for school. I have to be at work in 30 minutes and I can't be here to baby you every ten minutes." She babbled.

"Okay Dawn" I sighed. All this she was telling me, I already heard before. This was like a morning routine. She'd wake me up at the same time, say the same things, and leave at the same time. It was as if she was programmed to do all of this.

"I'll be home at 7 tonight you know what to do "Yes" I simply said. "Okay then I'm out, bye" she said already out the door.

I went back to my room and looked around at the empty space where I slept. There was nothing but an old beat-up mattress, a few full boxes, and an empty closet. I hated this place. It was too small for the three of us and it was in one of the worst neighborhood in Chicago, but ever since mama died a few months ago this is all Dawn and I could afford. I could only dream of more.

I dragged my feet to the bathroom and looked at my reflection in the mirror my semi-short jet black hair was in a messy side braid. I did my hygiene thing as quick as possible. Once I was done I took a quick look at the clock which read 6:05

I headed to my sisters room to find a sleeping Tommy. He was in a deep sleep. His curly black hair was still and his mouth was closed. I hesitated to wake him out of his peaceful sleep. but quickly did after a while.

His brown eyes fluttered open. "Zen I don't want to get up" he whispered. I ran my fingers through his soft hair. He was such an adorable seven year old and I loved him so much, but just like me he hated the morning.

I wasn't one of those older sisters who hated their little brother, because they got on their nerves. Tommy was sweet; he never lied, wasn't the type to cause problems, and always thought about others. He was going to break hearts once he was older.

I brushed the covers off of him. "Hurry up Tommy it's almost 6:30, you need to get ready" I said after sitting with him for some time. We had twenty minutes till we had to be at the bus stop and I knew we were wasting time.

After I got Tommy ready to go I went to my room and grabbed something comfortable to wear then picked up my phone from the side of the bed and dialed Carmen's number.

Carmen, my best friend of five years. I couldn't really count on her for anything. You would think you're best friend was always there for you, and tried hard to give you anything. Carmen wasn't like that though. She did what was convenient for her and never really cared about people's feelings. She was really all I had though. She wasn't as hard on me as she was others, but she was still the same, closed and bitter. I saw past her though and decided to give her chance, since she never really had any friends. She wasn't always that bad though, we did have good memories, and she could be a good person sometimes.

She answered after the third ring "Hey Zen, what's up?" She groaned. She sounded a little tired, and out of breath, but I thought nothing of it.

"Nothing Carmen I just wanted to know if you could give Tommy and I a ride, we're late" I spoke in the phone.

"I can't today, sorry" I sighed in frustration. This was almost just like her, selfish and heartless. I disconnected the call, with out saying any further words, and threw it down on the bed. Looks like I would have to run to the bus stop today.

I threw on some clothes, making sure they were at least clean and jogged to the kitchen seeing that Tommy was ready and waiting on me. "I'm sorry Tommy, but we don't have time to eat breakfast let's go" He sighed, but grabbed his things and followed me out the door.

The bus stop wasn't too far, but it wasn't that close either. We sped walked there nearly running. Tommy tried his hardest to keep up, but seeing that he was a little on the fat side, that was kind of a difficult task. "Tommy come on you have to run faster" I said, trying to give him a little motivation. His breathing became heavier, but he did run a little faster

We made it to the bus stop in almost record time, and I was pretty proud of myself, but shit I was tired, I needed to get in shape, and so did Tommy. He put his hands on his knees panting and gasping for air. I patted his shoulder trying to calm him down.

The bus was a little late, which was good, because other wise we wouln't have made it. We boarded the city bus with all the other old women and crackhead looking men. I showed him my bus ticket and we took the nearest seats.

We should be taking the school bus, instead of the city bus, but this neighborhood was far too dangerous, that the district didn't even have the buses run this way, leaving us to fend for ourselves.

I leaned back in the seat letting my mind run wild. I really wanted better for us. I wanted us to okay, and I wanted us to have more. I don't understand why we had to suffer, it just didn't male sense to me. We were all fairly good kids and we never caused any real trouble, so why us? The bus came to a stop, knocking me out of my thoughts.

It wasn't our stop so I stayed in my place. I looked over at Tommy who had a half eaten chocolate bar in his hand. I just shook my head and laughed. "Where did you get that from?" He just shrugged back and continued eating.

Time went by and we had made it to our stop. Tommy and I proceeded off the stop and walked to Tommy's little elementary school. Everyday I dropped him off I wished that it was me walking through those double doors instead of him, to go back to my younger years. I watched as he walked in the building safely and then made my way to my own high school.

I didn't mind walking to school everyday. It was a time to clear my mind, and all of that. I didn't rush, because I would still be getting there a little more early, because school didn't even start till eight so it was fine.

I got to school, with a little time to spare, I didn't really care that much. I walked to the parking lot seeing a few familiar faces, but I didn't bother to speak. That was another thing about me, I tried to stay to myself as much as possible. Too much attention or any attention at all was never what I wanted.

I walked up seeing a familiar car, I turned around to see Carmen's car with her in the back seat all over another boy, who happened to be the boyfriend of one of the most known girls at our school . I rolled my eyes and kept walking to school. Wasn't the first time, and probably wouldn't be the last.

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