What Have I Done to Us? (Phanfiction)

Chapter Five - "The Place I Will Always Call Home"

"Phil's POV"

I didn't know where my feet were taking me, anywhere but Starbucks right now was good. I will just have to apologise to Milly later about not getting the coffees. Not that she wanted one anyway, this was just a scheme, a set up to get me to talk to Dan again, and I was honestly at breaking point.

I was just beginning to get past that part of my life and move on to another, more predictable future than living in a flat with my best friend for the rest of my life. I was willing to leave that life behind, and only have it a as a happy memory, like the kinda ones you tell your grandchildren. I had an amazing girlfriend, a wonderful paying job and still kept at my little hobby of making videos for the fans, that I to this day still adore. What more could this window of opportunity bring? This was the pathway to a new, refreshed me, just like I always hoped for one day. Obviously my body didn't agree with my mind.

I had realised with all my deep thought that I hadn't noticed that my feet had brought me to the door of that old memory, and found myself grabbing the key sitting on top of the thick frame around the door and shoving it into the lock. I slammed the door behind me and ran straight for Dan's bedroom. The one place I knew he wouldn't predict me to be in. He is probably still sitting in Starbucks sipping at that stupid mocha I gave to him. I threw myself onto the bed and started staining his pillow with my tears. I wrapped myself in his duvet, and just let it all out. Everything in this room reminded me of the fun life I had with Dan and all the funny videos that we made together, that we laughed all the way through. If we were still doing that, this year would be Philisnotonfire 8. But of course there wasn't another one after 5. When I left, all the videos just stopped. I didn't used my YouTube channel for a whole year after I moved in with Milly, as she kinda thought it was silly that I was putting my life on the internet. So being the boy I am, I tried to impress her by stopping. But who was I kidding? That was the thing that I enjoyed, and it made me happy, the fans happy, so after a "gap year" from YouTube I began again.

And I convinced Milly to be in videos with me, and I started fresh from there. But that's not who I was. I used to have the funniest stories to tell every week, like something stupid Dan did or whatever, but all my videos were about now were.... Milly. And how in love we are. Don't get me wrong, I love here to bits, but she was starting to rule my life.

I found myself drifting off to sleep, to the scent of Dan on the duvet so I snuggled into it more and soon I was transported to dreamland. Or more like nightmare kingdom.

I felt my eyes creep open, to see a bright white room with nothing in it but myself and the chair I was tied to. There were mirrors floor to ceiling on all four of the walls and after my eyes adjusted, all I could see in them was my reflection. I was all battered and bruised, and I could feel the whip marks across my legs as they throbbed. Who had done this to me? Why did they? Suddenly out of nowhere this tall scary looking old man appeared with a knife this time, and threw it straight at me, missing the side of my ear by sheer millimetres, and shattering a pane of the mirror behind me, which made me flinch. I tried calling out to the only person I knew would help.

"Dan! Dan! You can't let this happen to me! You've got to help me Dan, please...." I pleaded and screamed.

The man disappeared, and left me with the room now full of fire, to burn and die. Dan wasn't going to come. He had given up on me a long time ago. Let's just face it now, I'm dead. And he probably won't even care when I'm gone. I started to inhale the smoke from the flames and embrace what death would bring. It couldn't be any worse than this, could it?

I felt myself still laying down on Dan's bed, now with a puddle of sweat around me, gross. But this time, I thought I was really dead. That nightmare has never gone that far before. I thought it was the end for me. It felt so real this time.

I started sobbing to myself, but kept my eyes closed to restrain me from anymore memories Dan's room held. Then I heard footsteps coming up the hallway, towards the room. Dan. I did the only thing I thought was necessary and pretended to sleep. I could hear the creak of the door as he pushed it open and I could feel him staring at me. Please don't wake me up. Please don't wake me up. Just leave me here. I could hear light footsteps in the room, and something unplugging from the wall before finally the room was only holding me again. I decided to just lay here for a while, pondering about my life before deciding to pick myself up out of the bed, I borrowed a pair of Dan's sweat pants, and boxers as I knew he wouldn't mind, and practically tip toed to the bathroom to start my shower.

It was long and relaxing and as soon as I finished blow-drying my hair, I made my way out to the lounge room to confront Dan. He was sitting there watching an anime that I didn't know the name of. Usually he would share everything with me. Oh yeah, I forgot, I don't live here anymore. I thought.

I must of grabbed his attention because as he turned around and noticed it was me, he jumped from his spot on the lounge, ran over to me and pulled me into a quick tight hug before releasing again.

"Oh my god Phil, you can't just run off like that and expect that everything's going to be fine afterwards, I was so so worried about you, but after I found you in my room, a huge relief was lifted off my chest Phil, because I knew you were safe, and I-" I cut Dan off as my lips crashed against his.

Author's Note:

Well it's the 5th chapter already so, I thought I'd start getting into the serious business, and what's not anymore serious than getting a little intimate? It's why it's called a Phanfiction! But this is only the very beginning of the story yet. So what are your thoughts so far? What about Milly? Does Phil really love her anymore? Well comment, vote and all that jazz and I will see you in chapter 6 lovelies! Thanks for reading!

abunchofpheels C: