The Lovely Suicide Children

Chapter 7: The School Chain

Different faces walked passed me. I studied those I saw walking. Their styles, face expressions, accents, and anything that stood out to me. My heart felt like someone was squeezing it over and over again. My nerves were uneasy, and I sat restlessly in my seat. My mind only thought about everything except my education. Who would I make as friends? Who would help me when I needed them? Would I ever be close to someone? What would my teachers be like?

"Penny for your thoughts," Rose said, snapping me out of them.

I faced her. "Huh?" I said, unsure of what she meant.

She chuckled. "What's on your mind?"

I let out a weak laugh that mixed with a sigh. "This whole school thing."

"It's just like middle school," she said.

"The food is better," Maddy said then took a bite of salad. "In middle school, we couldn't choose what to eat. It's really, really different here."

Rose nodded. "Exactly."

"Actually, this is my first time in a school," I said.

"What? You've never been to public school?" she asked.

"I haven't. This is my first time."

She thought about it for a second then nodded her head. "I don't think I caught your name."

"Olivia," I said.

"Pretty name," she smiled at me, making me feel a bit awkward inside. "I hope you have a great experience here. It's not so bad."

"Yeah, but she's in for it. She bumped into Megan Vose," Maddy said with bulging eyes as if she said a bad name. From the looks on her face, Megan didn't sound like a real pony at the park.

I was about to ask a question, but a loud bell interrupted us. Rose explained how my class would be on the schedule they had given us before we started. I did have that schedule. My first class was with a woman named, Mrs. Bamlin in room 736. After the bell had rung, I let Rose lead me to my class. Maddy had left to her class before us.

As we walked through the hall, I felt a hand intertwine with mine. "Hey, you're shaking like a leaf," Rose said, stopping us in a room full of lockers. She moved me towards the wall so others could get by. "It's going to be okay, and if you need anything or have any questions I can help you," she said, letting my hand go.

I smiled at her. For some reason, her touch calmed me down. I was not used to human contact, especially with other people. I've had maybe as many hugs as I can count in my life, which was probably an even six. I don't know what I felt exactly. It was a mixture of calm and panic. "Thank you, Rose," I said.

***

I've managed to finish five periods of classes without dying. I didn't have to introduce myself, and I didn't make any other friends than Rose and Maddy if I could call them that. My teachers were kind, the classmates were wild but decent at the same time, and no one bothered me. I listened to the teachers who didn't talk about much in general except what to expect after today. It was okay.

When we were given a break to go out, I placed my headphones on my ears and walked out onto an empty field of grass behind the school. I sat down next to an Apple Tree full growing with red apples. I thought it was pretty cool because I've never seen an Apple Tree before. Taking out my phone, I put on a song by Paramore, put my headphones on, and sat back against the trunk of the tree.

"I should be over all the butterflies but I'm into you, I'm into you. And even baby our worst nights. I'm into you, I'm into you. Let 'em wonder how we got this far. 'Cause I don't really need to wonder at all. Yeah, after all this time. I'm still into you"