Finding Elphaba (Book 2 in Endless Love Trilogy)

A Hint to the Past?

I run the entire way back to the house, and as I burst through the door I hear Glinda. "Oh hello Elphie. How-" Ignoring her I rush to my room and slam the door. "What is wrong with her?" Glinda asks Bessie. "I am not sure, but maybe you should go talk to her."

"No! No! No!" I growl as I pace the floor. My hands tremble. "I have to make it stop!" I clench my fists squeezing my eyes shut as I slam my fists on the desk.

Suddenly, there is a timid knock on my door. "E-Elphie?" Its Glinda. "Go away!" I half yell at her. "Elphie, please let me in!" She says sounding worried. "No Glinda! Just go away!" I yell again. I hear her sigh. "Elphaba, please let me in, and tell me what's wrong."

"There is nothing wrong! Now leave me alone!" This time when I turn around and glare at the door. I unclench one fist and suddenly realize I am holding a ball of green fire in my hand. Wide eyed I quickly close my fist. I take a slow deep breath and move towards the door. "Glinda, I'm sorry I yelled and I am sorry I have caused you to worry, but I can assure you that I am quite alright." I lie. I can hear her on the other side of the door shift slightly. "Very well, Elphie." She sounds irritated. "If you don't want to let me in and talk then fine." I hear her turn to go, but she stops. "Elphie, I hope you know and understand that I am always here whenever you want to talk or just need someone to listen." Though she can't see me I give her a sad smile. "I know, and thank you." She doesn't hear me though I realize I hear her walking away.

Now that I have settled down I take out my journal, and go to sit down at my desk. I change my mind though when I glance over at my bed. I instead settle myself down on my bed and begin to record what happened today.

Dear Diary,

I realize I don't typically write in you more than once during a day, but I absolutely must write down today's events! I feel what happened is far too important for me to forget. I believe I may have been given a slight hint of my past!

As you know I decided to go for a walk in the woods and spend the afternoon in the clearing. Well, needless to say that isn't quite what happened. Oh, don't get me wrong I went to the clearing, but it was what happened while I was there that caused me to leave the clearing earlier than planned.

I arrived at the clearing a little afternoon I believe, and was surprised to find I was not alone. In the clearing was a mother Deer and her two fawns. I reassured them I was not there to hurt any of them, and had the oddest feeling that they somehow knew what I was saying. I was more than surprised when the mother approached me, "Is it really you?" she says. Well, you can imagine my shock when I heard her speak! I thought at first I had just thought I heard her speak, but went on to tell me that many Animals could talk though there weren't as many As there use to be. She told me I knew that though, as I use to stand up to the Wizard for their rights. I don't remember any of that.

If that wasn't shocking enough one of her children said that she thought that I was dead! She said that I was supposed to have been killed by a child, and that child had used a bucket of water to kill me. That's one of the most ridiculous things I have ever heard. I mean I suppose it could happen after all with my allergy to water, but the chances of a single bucket of water killing me is well... well... slim to none I suppose.

They also processed to tell me all the people of Oz believe me to be dead because of an announcement that was made. An announcement that Glinda of all people made. Now why would she say I was dead when I am not?

I stop writing for a few minutes and stare towards the door. I think for a moment and flip back to my first entry. I reread the entry paying attention to the fact that I write that she looked shocked and confused to see me. Sighing I turn back to where I had left off writing.

You know now that I have reread my entry on how she reacted seeing me I has me thinking about something. She seemed shocked, confused, and now that I think about she looked as if she was seeing a ghost when she saw me that first day. It has me believing that she genuinely believed that I really was dead...

Another odd thing happened, and it was similar to what occurred the first time I met Glinda. When the Deer told me what happened I got upset and very angry at Glinda. I began pacing and talking to myself, and apparently I began to draw on whatever that power was I felt that first day. I didn't realize it this time though. At least not until the Deer drew my attention to my hands. When I looked down at them you can imagine my surprise when I saw my fists were glowing! Needless to say I panicked and took off as quickly as I could.

Once I got back I immediately came to my room. I believe I have given Glinda and Bessie a scare though because Glinda came and tried to get me to let her in. I wouldn't let her, and then she wanted me tell her what's wrong. I lied to her and say I was fine. I am fairly sure she doesn't believe me, but frankly as ashamed as I am of lying to her I really don't care if she believes me or not. What I do know is I can't bare to talk to her right now.

I am so overwhelmed right now I am not sure what to do, but what I do know is that I need time to think, time to calm down, and hopefully during this time I can begin to sort through this newly discovered information. I know talking to Glinda would likely give me some answers, but for her safety I can't do that right now, and so until then I will confide in you.

~E.M. Thropp

I close my journal and place it on my night stand. It will soon be supper time, but I am more tired and mentally exhausted from today's events to care about eating, and so I place my glasses on my journal and lay down. Maybe if I rest for a half hour I will feel calmer and less tired.